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Newest Member: Tcdd2378

Just Found Out :
Tactical Primer

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Karma62 ( member #23320) posted at 9:29 PM on Friday, March 20th, 2009

You seem to be the experienced person. I am new. My only comment on your primer is the not spending time together part initially. Ok,.... like the first 2 - weeks painful, but the next 2 months were key to spend time (or is that the 3 - 6 month thing?). We took two trips since D-day, skiing and the UK, both good ideas for us and our therapist said also. He goes away and I am lost. Being togehter seems to help, for both of us to get over this.

Me: BS 48
Him: FWH 64
Married 19
D-Day # 1 31-10-07 EA?? (Denied!)
D-Day # 2 17-12-08 Full PA both years same OW
OW 37S Neighbour (NC)
Working on R with hope
"You have been Weighed, Measured and you have been Found wanting" -

posts: 275   ·   registered: Mar. 20th, 2009   ·   location: Canada
id 3712039
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JoePike ( member #13207) posted at 12:54 PM on Thursday, April 2nd, 2009

Bump for Allybam and other newcomers

"Do or do not. There is no Try" - Yoda.

"The term “mistake” infers a level of ignorance, innocence and naivety. And a lack of intent and planning." - Craig Harper

posts: 3952   ·   registered: Jan. 9th, 2007
id 3739213
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newyear ( member #22713) posted at 1:35 PM on Thursday, April 2nd, 2009

Once again, Thanks for your information and sharing your thoughts.

WH 62--hired the same prostitute during his overseas business trips to Shanghai, China in 6/08 & 12/08
BW 59
M 38 yr
2 daughters 29 & 27--Both are M
DDay 7/08--Took him 6 months to defogged and admitted the A
12/08 --Working very hard on the R

posts: 1555   ·   registered: Feb. 3rd, 2009   ·   location: Midwest
id 3739280
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SuspiciousWife ( member #18108) posted at 11:39 PM on Wednesday, April 8th, 2009

Bumping again.

Me - BW, 44
Him - FWH, 44
OW - former co-worker
3 great kids
DDay - April 25, 2008 - mostly EA with one make-out session

posts: 557   ·   registered: Feb. 8th, 2008   ·   location: East Coast
id 3753563
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gma56 ( member #19595) posted at 5:51 AM on Tuesday, April 28th, 2009

Bump it to the top !

BW-Divorced
It's my life now, my choices, my mistakes to make and my victories to celebrate. His choices made me free of liars and betrayers in my life. That is priceless.

posts: 20502   ·   registered: May. 19th, 2008   ·   location: Closer to where I want to be..
id 3801235
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snowdrop ( member #23594) posted at 10:12 AM on Tuesday, April 28th, 2009

This has been really, really helpful; thank you!

Me: BW, 38
WH: 37
2 DS
DDays:first one was Feb 09.
Separating, after 18 months of trying to R.

posts: 206   ·   registered: Apr. 12th, 2009   ·   location: UK
id 3801328
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redrock ( member #21538) posted at 1:50 AM on Friday, May 1st, 2009

Bumping

I don't respect anyone that can't spell a word more than one way:)

posts: 3531   ·   registered: Nov. 6th, 2008   ·   location: Michigan
id 3809382
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hecheated400 ( member #23602) posted at 9:12 PM on Sunday, May 3rd, 2009

A must read for all newbies on JFO. Thanks so much!

bump.

WH - 60
BS - 57 me
married 12/26/08
f4D 1/06/09

posts: 63   ·   registered: Apr. 13th, 2009   ·   location: San Diego
id 3815392
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Jodi ( member #23781) posted at 11:42 PM on Sunday, May 3rd, 2009

Thank you for taking the time to do this. It really helps. I justt found out about the A a couple weeks ago and am still in a state of disbelief and feel paralized to do anything.

posts: 85   ·   registered: Apr. 28th, 2009   ·   location: California
id 3815551
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kluelesskat ( member #23552) posted at 7:58 AM on Tuesday, May 5th, 2009

Good plan

Me - BS
Him - WS
MOW - Ole fatty w 2 others on the side besides mine and her husband

posts: 215   ·   registered: Apr. 8th, 2009   ·   location: Canada Eh
id 3819257
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 SerJR (original poster member #14993) posted at 3:21 AM on Friday, May 8th, 2009

Updates made

Me: BH - Happily remarried.
Hope is never lost. It exists within you - it is real. It is not a force in and of itself - it is something that you create with every thought, action, and choice you make. It is a gift that you create for yourself.

posts: 18630   ·   registered: Jun. 15th, 2007   ·   location: Further North than South
id 3828477
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thyme2go ( member #12908) posted at 6:52 PM on Monday, May 11th, 2009

Bumping for new members.

BH - no longer 50
3 DD's - (32, 28 and 21)
Divorced on 8/6/09

posts: 9204   ·   registered: Dec. 10th, 2006   ·   location: ND
id 3836396
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itspjw ( member #21268) posted at 5:10 PM on Tuesday, May 12th, 2009

bump back to page one

no, I can't take one more step towards you...cuz all that's waiting is regret...

there's just too much that time cannot erase

dday 9/11/08

And the more I know, the less I understand

Because of you...I am afraid...

posts: 14786   ·   registered: Oct. 15th, 2008   ·   location: Texas
id 3838810
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 SerJR (original poster member #14993) posted at 3:23 AM on Friday, May 15th, 2009

Me: BH - Happily remarried.
Hope is never lost. It exists within you - it is real. It is not a force in and of itself - it is something that you create with every thought, action, and choice you make. It is a gift that you create for yourself.

posts: 18630   ·   registered: Jun. 15th, 2007   ·   location: Further North than South
id 3846917
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gma56 ( member #19595) posted at 5:10 AM on Sunday, May 17th, 2009

Give ya bump Ser !!

BW-Divorced
It's my life now, my choices, my mistakes to make and my victories to celebrate. His choices made me free of liars and betrayers in my life. That is priceless.

posts: 20502   ·   registered: May. 19th, 2008   ·   location: Closer to where I want to be..
id 3852008
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gma56 ( member #19595) posted at 8:18 PM on Sunday, May 17th, 2009

More pain so giving it front page

BW-Divorced
It's my life now, my choices, my mistakes to make and my victories to celebrate. His choices made me free of liars and betrayers in my life. That is priceless.

posts: 20502   ·   registered: May. 19th, 2008   ·   location: Closer to where I want to be..
id 3852704
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Joyslyn ( new member #24027) posted at 4:30 AM on Monday, May 18th, 2009

Wow. Thank you! Just began reading this post... and am compelled to bump again.

D-Day: 4/6/09, Holy Week
A lasted 7 months.
M 8 years. Together 11 years.
My 2nd M. His 3rd M.
2 kids each - 24, 17, 15, 14
0 kids together
bs 45 (me)
wh 55
ow 51

posts: 41   ·   registered: May. 16th, 2009   ·   location: Chicago Suburbs
id 3853413
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JustKeepSwimmig ( member #19269) posted at 5:50 PM on Friday, May 22nd, 2009

Bump

Mr. JKS - EA/PA
DDay - April 2008

posts: 2144   ·   registered: Apr. 25th, 2008   ·   location: Canada
id 3865487
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SuspiciousWife ( member #18108) posted at 3:24 PM on Thursday, May 28th, 2009

bump

Me - BW, 44
Him - FWH, 44
OW - former co-worker
3 great kids
DDay - April 25, 2008 - mostly EA with one make-out session

posts: 557   ·   registered: Feb. 8th, 2008   ·   location: East Coast
id 3876662
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Hell a fury ( new member #24115) posted at 3:43 PM on Thursday, May 28th, 2009

Thank-you. Wish I'd read this sooner, before acting like a hot head.

posts: 42   ·   registered: May. 24th, 2009
id 3876714
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