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Warning: I need advice on pooping, TMI ahead...

I'm really frustrated and need all the advice I can get.

My dd, now 14, has always had problems with her bowels. As an infant she struggled to poop and when she did it was hard rocks. I brought this up to all of her doctors who just put her on laxatives. When we were eventually sent to a specialist after a few years of me constantly bitching and we were told her lower bowel was the shape of a grape fruit and all the stool was just settling in there. Again told to just use laxatives.

For years we struggled. She had support staff when she started school mainly because the laxatives made her constantly leak so she had to wear pull-ups all the time.

Then at one appointment with her endocrinologist, the suggestion was made to wean her off laxatives and get her on a bowel routine. Over the 2 months of summer vacation we did this and it was amazing. Dd would sit and try even though she didn't feel she had to go. I increased Fibre and she has always been good at drinking tonnes of water.

For years this has worked but now it's not working.

DD actually asked me to buy her the chocolate exlax. That works but she will leak again before she finally goes.

She says she doesn't get any feeling to poop. She knows she has to go when she has tummy pain and her butt hurts. By then her bowel movement is the size of at least four Campbell soup cans stacked one on the other. It's thick enough to plug the toilet so we end up having to bag it up then open the septic tank and dump it in.

This is insane! I'm still so mad I didn't push even harder when she was younger to have doctors investigate WHY she couldn't poop. Why she doesn't have any feeling to poop until it's causing her pain.

It's going to take a while to get her in to see a gastroenterologist again. First need referral from family doc and family doc could take a few weeks.

In the mean time any advice or suggestions to get her going daily? Or even every other day?

She is struggling emotionally with this and just her overall health. She keeps saying she's just all f**Ed up. She's still to small, her eye sight has problems. Thankfully our optometrist is on top of that and she's going for further testing in 2 weeks.

Is there something she can take daily that won't make her leak but will help her go before it gets so huge?

Thanks

Oh my, that sounds so incredibly frustrating for everyone, but also so painful.

I know you mentioned her drinking lots of water and the increase in fiber. Were you using fiber pills or increasing with her diet? Apples, pears, kiwi are high in fiber. Dates or slightly warm prune juice? Most beans...black, lentils. Watermelon?

Have you ever found any food that seems to make it easier?

So many people think they drink a lot of water and when forced to actually measure the amount, it often is less then they think.

Sending pooping mojo...

She's always been a picky eater but fruits and veggies are eaten up by all the kids. We used high Fibre cereal.

She has trouble with pills.

As for water, that's all we pretty much drink. We have two Britta filters going constantly. They only take huge water bottles to school.

I think she's been lazy in sticking to the sit and try even if she doesn't feel the need to go. I explained that she needs to get back on that and try every day.

I'm so sorry she is suffering.

I have a similar problem and it is no fun! Hopefully you can get some good advice from a medical professional. For years I was told to increase my fiber which I did. I eventually found out that fiber makes my problem worse. I take miralax everyday and avoid lots of foods.

I hope somebody can figure out something to help her.

I was going to ask about Miralax.

Start with every other day and increase to daily if needed.

That’s all I’ve got.

What about the reported side effects from using Miralax for those under 17years old?

We are picking up the rental car tomorrow so I'm going to stop at the pharmacy and see what the pharmacist says.

She's scared she will rip herself open if she has another bowel movement like that.

I feel for her.

Good idea to ask the pharmacist.

My niece had to give miralax (it was prescribed) to her son when he was five. I think he used it for several months.

I have Docusate Sodium capsules here but she has a very hard time swelling pills.

I feel so defeated. She was doing so well for so long. And omg the fights with doctors trying to explain that something was wrong and being dismissed was so hard to deal with.

Of course now I'm all mama bear strong and won't take any crap from them.

You knew I would respond to this right?

First not all humans were made to poop every day. However it is not normal to have extremely hard stool or to be in pain when you poop.

So it sounds like she needs a hard reset so to speak.

1. Fiber. She needs to add in a daily dose (preferably in the am) of fiber, do NOT use tablets they are useless and do not have enough fiber content. Get Metamucil, psyllium, benefiber, or similar. Mix with a juice that also has fiber and helps with pooping orange juice and if you can convince an orange/prune juice mix.

2. A gallon of water, not soda, not tea, not juice but a full gallon of water a day.

3. Miralax. For chronic slow gut (which is what this sounds like) it can be a miracle med. However or should I say HOWEVER, it is not made to work immediately or relieve constipation. Any disease or trial you do with it you need to be consistent for at least 3 days preferably a week. Start with one scoop. Then adjust accordingly.

4. Fruit. Make sure she is eating citrus, or plumes or prunes daily.

5. See a GI Dr or a colorectal surgeon that specializes in motility disorders. She needs a motility study where they swallow a capsule full of tiny rubber bands that come out with sto.ach acid. Then followed daily with xrays to see how long it takes to move through the gut. She probably also needs a rectal manometry study that checks sensation and function of the rectal sphincter. All play a roll in getting normal BMs.

Definitely start the fiber water and miralax now. Keep a food diary too. Limit junk and sugary stuff. Normalize it with her as much as possible. Everyone poops. Reassure her we all struggle from time to time.

Hi Tush, yes I knew you'd respond lol

Thank you for the info on the type of studies that need to be done. I feel better informed and will bring these up for sure.

I wish these had been done Years ago but dammit the docs wouldn't listen to me. Now she can explain it to them and together we will get this sorted out.

She just asked me if there's other people out there who have this problem and I'm like sure is. Then I reassured her that we will get it fixed. She's terrified of surgery which the last doctor mentioned because of how stretched her rectum is.

I honestly don't know how she gets these big ones out without tearing herself all to hell, especially with how tiny she is.

I'll pic up the meds and fruit tomorrow.

Yes it is not uncommon. Mine comes and goes unfortunately I've had it for a few months now. Amusingly (or not) D Day my last bout resolved when my body went into shock. It must have been the adrenaline etc. I suspect mine is connected to the brain as I am not a very outwardly emotional person and I think my stress manifests as gut issues and migraines (which are serotonin related which is stored in gut). I'd call myself a depressed realist but I digress. A bum doctor (that's what his wife called him but he was a gastroenterologist) once told me most gut issues are psychological.

I'm going to try finnen bread next as when I was postpartum that was the only thing that worked (I was drinking 7 litres water a day, prune juice, movicol etc as instructed by physio nurse and nothing worked).

Two more things (only because I've had two prolapse repairs but that was after kids) she may want to:
~ use a stool (pardon pun) to sit her feet up higher when she sits on the loo
~ use some toilet paper to out pressure on her other bits when she is pooping to provide support because actually yes if she strains hard and it is like a rock it can cause tears or worse (I'd hope not at her age but wouldnt know)

Yes she uses a stool lol. When she was younger she just squatted on the toilet.

As for the pressure to avoid a tear, ya I have done that myself. I get terribly constipated during that time of the month and a few times I thought I was going to tear up everything.

Well after posting here I then spent the evening getting spammed by ads on Facebook to help me with bloating, and was subjected to numerous testimonials from satisfied customers about how they'd blown their toilet to kingdom come after taking just one magical pill.

Who's got time for dating or relationships when there's this much action to be had at the end of a hard week.

Lol.

I had an add pop up once for making money by selling your poop. A place actually paid to have people send them their poop. Ewe!

The trick is to not let her get so constipated so she doesn't feel like she is being ripped in two
surgery is not really a definitive treatment for this, so if someone recommends that right off, refuse and demand to treat the condition that is causing it first.

Next keep giving her miralax daily you will find the "magic" dose to keep her regular so that she is having soft/non-painful BM's daily or every other day.

I'd stay away from senna based laxatives like exlax Those can cause painful cramping, and violent BM's. If she is feeling like she is going to have hard BM's then try some glycerin suppositories so it softens the stool near the exit so it is a bit easier to pass.

If she is feeling constipated to the point of needing a laxative or immediate relief then give her milk of magnesia. It is more gentle, and won't cause the chronic dependence on the laxatives that long term use of senna based laxative do.

Tush I totally love you!!@

Surgery was mentioned because her rectum looks like an orange instead of a tube. It's stretched. Feces collects there. This is the result of not having any doctors listen to me when she was an infant and then waiting until she was a toddler before getting sent to a gastrointrologist.

I begged them to look at WHY things weren't moving properly through her system.
Begged and was ignored!

We eventually discovered that she isn't absorbing the nutrients from what she eats. All of her vitamins and mineral levels were low.

She takes 1000UI of vitamins D and a muti vitamin for everything else.

Yikes! I'm sorry it's so hard for her to find relief!

My DD had pooping issues too when she was being potty trained. We ended up in the ER one night because her stomach pains were so bad. She ended up with glycerin suppositories... something her 4yr old (at the time) brother picked up on and now is NOT allowed to mention on the point of losing screens for a month.

ANYWAY, it worked, it sucked, she cried, I wanted to cry, but the thing stayed up there and loosened it all up.

Maybe since your DD is past the age of reason it won't be such a big ordeal??

Also, there's a lot out there on YouTube about the vagal (vagus?) nerve and brain connection. Some of it sounded hippie-dippie to me, until I started tracking (mentally) when I had trouble going vs not. Turns out there may be something to it- my stress gets stored in my lower back and bowels apparently. When I'm finally able to relax, welll... things start moving.

TMI, but there could be a psychological component too? Like when you're trying to fall asleep and stress out about not sleeping and just make yourself to anxious to sleep?

I dont think this is psychological at all. She's had this problem even as an infant. Because she was a premie, was super tiny and not growing she was on special formula. They were always on me to calorie boost whatever she had once she moved to solids. All the while she wasn't pooping normally. Doc just prescribed laxatives to get her to go. I was always worried she would become dependent on them and she did. Then the other doc suggested weaning her off and retraining her body. For so long she's been going on her own ever other day or every 3 days. Considering she used to go once a week that was amazing.

My DD was constipated since birth. We were going to a motility clinic at the CHOP. She was referred to an adult motility clinic. We had the ring test, often. She is going for her 5th radioactive scrambled egg test, it is 4 hours of pictures of the progress of the eggs. She also has huge BM’s and her weigh will drop 5lbs after a successful clean out.

She does miralax, with hot tea. Her pediatric Motility Dr, told her water and up to 6 doses of miralax in a day. We also see better bowel movements when she is on her Menes.

We are just now coming up on the adult motility clinic appointment as Covid stopped new patient appointments.