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Newest Member: DCS72

New Beginnings :
A rite of passage

Topic is Sleeping.
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 Karmafan (original poster member #53810) posted at 3:39 PM on Friday, July 30th, 2021

Hi all,

I haven't been much on here but have been busy having a summer romance

Which crept up on me when I was not really looking.

I gave up on Online dating a couple of months ago but continued chatting with a guy who lives 2000 miles from me, on a small island in the middle of the Atlantic. He was handsome and charming and we could talk for hours.

Last week he flew in to meet me and, although the week we spent together was pleasant enough, it didn't quite match the expectations. It became apparent, after a couple of days, that we were far too different for a LDR to work. We still had a nice time, but as the week went by, I felt more and more detached, and the initial chemistry had all but evaporated.

To be fair, there were some glaring red flags: he was generally very self-centered and monopolized the conversation. No stable employment which might be ok at 27 but not at 57, and seven kids from three different women...you know where I am going with this.

But do I have any regrets? No, I don't. It was everything a fling should be: fun, exciting, unpredictable and...short

I think this has been a rite of passage for me because it is the first time ever, since my LTR ended last summer, that I was able to let myself go and felt something. It is now time to go back to reality

Me 48 XWH Irrelevant D-day 23 Feb 163 amazing, resilient kids

You are not a drop in the Ocean, you are the entire Ocean in a drop

posts: 639   ·   registered: Jun. 23rd, 2016   ·   location: UK
id 8679832
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BearlyBreathing ( member #55075) posted at 4:31 PM on Friday, July 30th, 2021

Sounds like fun- and I am a little jealous :-)

Glad you got to have the fun but also knew when to let go.

Isn’t it kinda nice to be healthy?

Me: BS 57 (49 on d-day)Him: *who cares ;-) *. D-Day 8/15/2016 LTA. Kinda liking my new life :-)

**horrible typist, lots of edits to correct. :-/ **

posts: 6240   ·   registered: Sep. 10th, 2016   ·   location: Northern CA
id 8679853
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WhoTheBleep ( member #49504) posted at 12:14 PM on Saturday, July 31st, 2021

Oooooh, a fun summer fling. Glad you enjoyed yourself, and didn't let it derail you.

I believe we have two lives: the one we learn with, and the one we live with after that. --The Natural

posts: 4524   ·   registered: Sep. 6th, 2015   ·   location: USA
id 8680095
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HalfTime2017 ( member #64366) posted at 5:51 AM on Tuesday, August 3rd, 2021

Thats exactly what dating is. It might be scary at first, but its fun to get back out there.

All I can say is keep going.

posts: 1425   ·   registered: Jul. 5th, 2018   ·   location: Cali
id 8680770
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 Karmafan (original poster member #53810) posted at 1:55 PM on Tuesday, August 3rd, 2021

Thanks everyone. It was certainly fun but not something I would necessarily want to repeat any time soon. Moving forward, the choice for me is really: on my own or in a committed relationship. Having said that, it’s nice to know that I can be with a man and feel something, but also, as you all said, know when to let go.

[This message edited by Karmafan at 7:58 AM, August 3rd (Tuesday)]

Me 48 XWH Irrelevant D-day 23 Feb 163 amazing, resilient kids

You are not a drop in the Ocean, you are the entire Ocean in a drop

posts: 639   ·   registered: Jun. 23rd, 2016   ·   location: UK
id 8680809
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twicefooled ( member #42976) posted at 5:50 PM on Tuesday, August 3rd, 2021

Excellent!

My first-romance-after-divorce sounds similar to yours. What I learned about myself is that I can have fun without attachments (which I didn't think I could do) and that I "still had it in me" and was sexy to a man. It reassured me that I would be just fine and that I still loved a good romance (especially my own).

Good for you, you are right it is definitely a rite of passage :)

May 29 2021 ***reclaimed myself and decided to delete my story with my ex because I'm now 7 years free from him and mentally healthier than I've been in years.

*********When you know better, you can do better*************

posts: 492   ·   registered: Apr. 2nd, 2014
id 8680896
Topic is Sleeping.
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