SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

Hi,

Hopefully this is on the correct forum and is considered appropriate

I had recent conversation on porn with my BS. Part of this was how as an adolescent and as an adult I watched porn with other men. I'm not talking about watching porn and masturbating. I said that I have watched porn at another guys house and I felt that was not uncommon (I initially used the word normal, but we decided that was not the appropriate word). This could have been a discussion on porn and my friend said he had a new one downloaded or on video (back in the day) and we would watch some of it. Maybe even exchange videos. Sometimes there was nothing on TV and it got put on. This did happen more as a teenager, but did continue to happen until about six years ago.

My question is, is it common that guys will watch porn together, not in a sexual way?

The conversation on watching porn, masturbation, acceptability of watching porn with a friend in the first place etc were had and will be had again. The only reason I'm asking is that I felt that a lot of guys I know or have known would have watched porn with a friend and thought nothing of it. My use of porn as an act of infidelity is not in question. That is something I may post on in the wayward forum, but will certainly continue to have with BS.

Very normal. I did that as a teen. And a military barracks isn't exactly a bastion of purity, but on any night you could find a room with porn on. I'm not saying it's OK, especially behind your wife's back, but you already said that. I haven't been a part of anything like that since being a very young military guy, and never will again. But you just asked about normalcy, and though it is very abnormal and weird when you think about it, it's also a very common young man/teen experience.

Not a guy,but when I was younger, it wasn't unusual to go to a house where a guy lived(or multiple guys), with friends,and they'd have porn on the TV. Maybe in the background, as they were playing pool,or whatever. They always did the gentlemanly thing, and turned it off when we arrived, which my girlfriends and I appreciated.

I think it used to be common. We did watch a little together when I was a teen in the dial up era. Back when there were limited screens and you had to buy porn with an ID check, it made some amount of sense. But there has definitely been a shift now that we all have 24/7 access to private screens and free porn.

When I was in college in the early 2000s, broadband Ethernet was a thing, my roommates and I used a couple of 500 GB external hard drives that we networked up as the "Love Drive" and those things were brimming with all sorts of downloaded porn. We all lived together for four years and for the most part during that time we all had steady relationships if not the same relationship the whole time, so it’s not like porn was substituted for actual sex with college age girls.

I guess I wouldn’t say it is normal, but I didn’t and still don’t see any issues with what we did. We were younger guys and we had and consumed a fair amount of porn.

When I was about 12 me and my buddies found a stack of Playboys in the woods. Still one of the best days of my life. 🤣

Thanks for the replies. The theme of the responses was very much pointed at this activity happening when younger. Which rings true for me. I think I used my porn usage as a teenager to justify my porn usage in later life.

It seems that some of my other justifications came/come from my youth. Something I intend to talk with my therapist about in the future.