nekonamida ( member #42956) posted at 8:23 PM on Wednesday, September 13th, 2023
Falling, we don't know what your WW is thinking. Maybe she has moved on emotionally with someone else and is ready for the marriage to end because she has a soft landing. Maybe she is bluffing and hoping this will get you to drop it. What she is NOT is an innocent spouse who never cheated and is being bombarded with falsehoods by you. She had sexual contact by her own admission and I agree with you - likely went all the way. And I agree too that you would need her to be honest in order to move forward with her. Whatever the reason, she has decided that she would rather the marriage end than be honest with you. She would rather you shut up and take it even if it means losing you. She has been and continues to be selfish to the very end. I'm sorry to say that she does not value the marriage the same way that you do and I know how incredibly hurtful that truth is. I have lived it and survived it.
Get yourself into IC. There is a life after her. There is a better relationship out there for you. It doesn't feel like it right now because she is all you know but I can tell you from the other side that it only becomes possible once you accept that she has made her choice and let her go. It opens the door to peace and happiness in ways you can't right now imagine because you've been stuck in this misery for so long.