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Newest Member: Stich

Divorce/Separation :
Just about to the finish line

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 TEMPE57 (original poster member #79570) posted at 7:03 PM on Monday, July 18th, 2022

My stbxww offered to sign off the house for 10,000 dollars. Still not sure why she offered it, but I took it. spent the last 4 days completely cleaning the house out, and have some contractors there this week, new carpet and a deep clean, the house will be on the market in a couple weeks

I got a favorable settlement from her, agreed to 50-50 custody, the kids stay in their school district, those were the big big ones I was going to fight for.

We have a hearing Monday where we will enter the final JOD. This whole process has been so awful, it's surreal that it's been 7 months and I'm standing this close to the finish line. I don't feel healed, I've been living in my own place for the last 3 months and that helped a lot, but it's gonna take a lot more time and I think (hope) I can finish healing after everything is final

I am most excited about getting rid of that house, it's full of broken dreams and promises, it hurts to look at it. She started her affairs the moment we moved into that house. It was supposed to be her dream house, the place we could watch the kids grow up, have their open houses, an investment we would cash in when the kids moved away. We did have some good times in that house but they're shrouded in pain and anguish. I can finally give away the stone that has been weighing me down.

Another couple weeks

[This message edited by TEMPE57 at 7:40 PM, Monday, July 18th]

posts: 196   ·   registered: Nov. 14th, 2019
id 8745279
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morningglory ( member #80236) posted at 7:08 PM on Monday, July 18th, 2022

She started her affairs the moment we moved into that house. It was supposed to be her dream house, the place we could watch the kids grow up, have their open houses, an investment we would cash in when the kids moved away.

Some people just can't appreciate what they have. I'm glad you're moving on and wish you the very best.

posts: 454   ·   registered: Apr. 15th, 2022
id 8745280
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BearlyBreathing ( member #55075) posted at 8:56 PM on Monday, July 18th, 2022

Yes, you will start healing faster. Still takes time, but it gets a lot better.

You are close— keep going!

Me: BS 55 (49 on d-day)Him: WH. 64. D-Day 8/15/2016 LTA. Kinda liking my new life :-)

**horrible typist, lots of edits to correct. :-/ **

posts: 4886   ·   registered: Sep. 10th, 2016   ·   location: Northern CA
id 8745305
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barcher144 ( member #54935) posted at 9:34 PM on Monday, July 18th, 2022

In my experience, the rate of healing accelerates once all of the legal stuff is behind you.

And I totally understand about the house. There was more than one reason why I didn't fight for the house during my divorce.

Me: BH, age 48Her: WS, age 45 (multiple EAs and PAs)D-Day: August 30, 2016

Diagnosed with depression in December 2016, which was primarily caused by my xWW's affair and associated emotional abuse.

posts: 5295   ·   registered: Aug. 31st, 2016
id 8745312
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DailyGratitude ( member #79494) posted at 1:33 PM on Tuesday, July 19th, 2022

Very sorry you are going through this.
I wish you wonderful and peaceful days ahead.
May your life be filled with love and joy that you and your kids deserve.
Good luck!

Me: BW mid 50’sHim: WH late 50’sMarrried 25 yearsDday: EA 2002 PA 9/2021Divorce 10/2021 (per wh’s request) WH left to be with AP

posts: 307   ·   registered: Oct. 17th, 2021   ·   location: Connecticut
id 8745375
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 TEMPE57 (original poster member #79570) posted at 2:14 PM on Tuesday, July 26th, 2022

Divorce is final!! She signed off all her interest in the house for 10,000 dollars. 50-50 custody. Feels like the biggest weight off my shoulders

posts: 196   ·   registered: Nov. 14th, 2019
id 8747256
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BearlyBreathing ( member #55075) posted at 3:08 PM on Tuesday, July 26th, 2022

Great job! Understand there may be a few more bumps in the roller coaster but you really truly can start the rest of your life now. You’ve done great and you’ve successfully gotten out of infidelity!

Me: BS 55 (49 on d-day)Him: WH. 64. D-Day 8/15/2016 LTA. Kinda liking my new life :-)

**horrible typist, lots of edits to correct. :-/ **

posts: 4886   ·   registered: Sep. 10th, 2016   ·   location: Northern CA
id 8747262
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barcher144 ( member #54935) posted at 5:01 PM on Tuesday, July 26th, 2022

CONGRATULATIONS!!!

Me: BH, age 48Her: WS, age 45 (multiple EAs and PAs)D-Day: August 30, 2016

Diagnosed with depression in December 2016, which was primarily caused by my xWW's affair and associated emotional abuse.

posts: 5295   ·   registered: Aug. 31st, 2016
id 8747282
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leafields ( member #63517) posted at 8:03 PM on Tuesday, July 26th, 2022

Congratulations!

BW M 34years, Dday 1: March 2018, Dday 2: August 2019, D final 2/25/21

posts: 1238   ·   registered: Apr. 21st, 2018   ·   location: Washington State
id 8747308
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