guvensiz ( member #75858) posted at 10:56 PM on Monday, October 4th, 2021
Whenever I see such a story and an approach, I am left in doubt as to whether the OP is a troll or not. I try to stay away from these types of threads.
When I read this story, the only sentence I want to write is "are you real?".
OP, I hope you expect the respect you expect from people here from your wife as well.
Actually no one here disrespect you and your WW here. Be sure that the people here were careful not to use the words that crossed their minds (which she deserved) when talking about her.
[This message edited by guvensiz at 4:57 PM, October 4th (Monday)]
longsadstory1952 ( member #29048) posted at 11:25 PM on Monday, October 4th, 2021
Yeah. This one felt off to me. Especially about taking the kids to meet the AP during the school year.
There was also a bit about supposed to be across the country while at the same time they are making small talk.
SI Staff ( Moderator #10) posted at 12:47 AM on Tuesday, October 5th, 2021
Please remember that this is a forum for support.
FLAMING & SHAMING: Please refrain from attacking or shaming, publicly or by using the SI.com Private Message feature. Do not bait or call out others. This includes members and non-members.
This guideline has been violated multiple times by multiple members. If you are unable to post respectfully then step away from the thread.
Please do not call out a member as troll. If you have concerns regarding the legitimacy of a member, please contact a moderator.
Charity411 ( member #41033) posted at 1:52 AM on Tuesday, October 5th, 2021
Thank you SI Staff for that reminder. I was shocked by the treatment of this member. There are nicer ways to express advice.
WontBeFooledAgai ( member #72671) posted at 7:17 PM on Tuesday, October 5th, 2021
Well, in fairness to the OP, he just had a very harsh mirror held up to him, and had presumably his most important core beliefs knocked pretty hard on here. He probably came into this thread seeing himself as a martyr of sorts--this noble and good man enduring all this pain to keep his family together. And here we are presenting very compelling evidence--truth in fact--that, NO, he is not a martyr, he is instead being a simp, and his actions are not at all noble, they are really anything but actually, and that he is in fact letting his kids down. Basically much of EVERYTHING he believes about love AND his wife has been shown to be just WRONG. So these posts were extremely challenging for the OP to read.
I suppose it is what often happens on the Wayward subforum, when a WS does not come back, usually out of shame. They get on some level that the harsh advice is actually right, and the truth often really hurts.
[This message edited by WontBeFooledAgai at 10:10 PM, Wednesday, October 6th]
Lalagirl ( member #14576) posted at 3:16 PM on Wednesday, October 6th, 2021
Very well said, WBFA. I'm sorry that the OP was hurt, but perhaps in time when the sting of our words has lessened, he will think about what was stated here and know that we had no intention of causing him hurt. Unfortunately, doses of reality often hurt. I remember waaaay back when I joined SI - I thought SI folk were insane - not my husband - he's not your run-of-the-mill wayward, no way!
[This message edited by Lalagirl at 3:17 PM, Wednesday, October 6th]
Me-56 FWH-58 Married 37 years 9/2/2021 grown daughters-37 & 34 11yo GS,8yo GD&6yo. GD (DD37) and 9yo GD & 4yo GD(DD34). D-day #1 - 1/06; D-day #2 - 3/07 Reconciled! Construction Complete. Astra inclinant, sed non obligant