Cookies are required for login or registration. Please read and agree to our cookie policy to continue.

Newest Member: LonelyandUnsure

New Beginnings :
Finally! I'm dating and loving my life...

This Topic is Archived
default

 GraceLove (original poster member #59212) posted at 5:23 AM on Wednesday, September 25th, 2019

Hi Everyone,

I honestly never thought I would get to the other side. All those dark early days when it felt like my life was completely obliterated.

Then the horrible separation and then the actual divorce process. Playing the waiting game, thinking that I will never find someone.

I can't tell you all how much I have appreciated all the love and support AND your ability to keep things real for me.

I recently started dating someone and it's true! There ARE good men out there. I'm so grateful to God.

At first I was attracting the same old same old. I got myself a mentor/ coach and learned how to online date (which I used to HATE and thought was a totally desperate, horrible thing to have to do to meet someone). I learned how to do it well so I was only attracting men with the same values. I had to do some intense inner work, but I'm so glad I did it, because it worked.

I'm so inspired by how this has happened that I've decided to be a life consultant/ mentor and help others.

It's early days but I haven't been excited about someone the way I am with him, for a looooong time.

So big thanks to all of you for walking this journey with me. Can't tell you how grateful I am. I can honestly say that divorce was the worst and definitely best thing that ever happened to me.

posts: 289   ·   registered: Jun. 14th, 2017
id 8442531
default

JanaGreen ( member #29341) posted at 5:34 AM on Wednesday, September 25th, 2019

Welcome to the other side! It's so much nicer here, isn't it???

posts: 9505   ·   registered: Aug. 17th, 2010   ·   location: Southeast US
id 8442538
default

 GraceLove (original poster member #59212) posted at 7:25 AM on Wednesday, September 25th, 2019

Hey JanaGreen,

Oh. My. Goodness. Can't believe it. It's almost surreal. I'm just so damn excited about the prospect of finally being with someone who is so much more similar to me than anyone I have ever met really.

posts: 289   ·   registered: Jun. 14th, 2017
id 8442549
default

WhoTheBleep ( member #49504) posted at 2:40 PM on Wednesday, September 25th, 2019

Aren't new beginnings grand???

Forget meeting someone new, the simple lack of abuse is absolutely euphoric. Now throw in a good man, and your heart, mind and body are about bursting with joy. So much positive energy you don't even know what to do with yourself!!

Yep, I know the feeling!! Getting the s*** blame shifting voices of our ex's out of our heads is huge!!

There ARE good men out there. I'm so glad you found one GraceLove.

I believe we have two lives: the one we learn with, and the one we live with after that. --The Natural

posts: 4526   ·   registered: Sep. 6th, 2015   ·   location: USA
id 8442660
default

 GraceLove (original poster member #59212) posted at 6:36 PM on Wednesday, September 25th, 2019

Hi WhoTheBLeep

Forget meeting someone new, the simple lack of abuse is absolutely euphoric. Now throw in a good man, and your heart, mind and body are about bursting with joy. So much positive energy you don't even know what to do with yourself!!

You hit the nail on the head! I was completely euphoric just before my divorce I thought I was bipolar!

But I wasn't. I was just one more abused woman who got out.

And boy oh boy...I'm so completely grateful that I am living back in my homeland, with my new (younger! and sooo hot!) Canadian boyfriend. Life is soooo good.

posts: 289   ·   registered: Jun. 14th, 2017
id 8442780
default

fooled13years ( member #49028) posted at 6:43 PM on Wednesday, September 25th, 2019

GraceLove

I'm so inspired by how this has happened that I've decided to be a life consultant/ mentor and help others

Congratulations!

I do not believe anything we experience in our lives is a waste, good or bad, if it is used to help someone else.

I removed myself from infidelity and am happy again.

posts: 1042   ·   registered: Aug. 18th, 2015
id 8442786
default

Phantasmagoria ( member #49567) posted at 8:25 PM on Wednesday, September 25th, 2019

Hey GraceLove, I’m curious to understand what adjustments you made that changed your dating results? Thank you.

posts: 474   ·   registered: Sep. 10th, 2015
id 8442853
default

BearlyBreathing ( member #55075) posted at 8:29 PM on Wednesday, September 25th, 2019

Ditto ....spill some of your OLD secrets!! And congratulations!!

Me: BS 57 (49 on d-day)Him: *who cares ;-) *. D-Day 8/15/2016 LTA. Kinda liking my new life :-)

**horrible typist, lots of edits to correct. :-/ **

posts: 6488   ·   registered: Sep. 10th, 2016   ·   location: Northern CA
id 8442858
default

Chrysalis123 ( member #27148) posted at 10:47 PM on Wednesday, September 25th, 2019

Ditto.... very curious to hear about the changes you made.

Someone I once loved gave me/ a box full of darkness/ It took me years to understand/ That this, too, was a gift. - Mary Oliver

Just for the record darling, not all positive changes feel positive in the beginning -S C Lourie

posts: 6709   ·   registered: Jan. 10th, 2010
id 8442945
default

 GraceLove (original poster member #59212) posted at 7:55 AM on Thursday, September 26th, 2019

Hi BarelyBreathing and Crysalis

Ditto ....spill some of your OLD secrets!! And congratulations!!

Ok! Here are a few but really it was about this whole approach that would take a long time to explain.

When you do you profile, it's all about values. Interests don't matter.

Sift through the profiles and you do the picking. Not the other way around.

I approached men first. I rarely would even respond to those who approached me. Unless he had actually read my profile and he was attractive.

I had alot of rules that I followed during the whole process.

I spent a lot of time (and money) on my profile as well as coaching. But hey, we all know how much divorce costs so it was nothing compared to that.

Did tons of work on myself.

Really figured out why I was attracting the wrong guys.

Gave myself a deadline of 90 days to find the guy.

That's it in a nutshell. Lots more to it but it worked for me.

And the great news is, I already have 2 clients who are excited to try this!

Seriously--there were somedays where I never ever thought life could be so good after all that happened!

posts: 289   ·   registered: Jun. 14th, 2017
id 8443101
default

Hopeful Lady ( member #30441) posted at 11:20 PM on Tuesday, October 8th, 2019

Congratulations Grace! I know the feeling - it’s amazing.

[This message edited by Hopeful Lady at 6:34 AM, October 9th (Wednesday)]

posts: 189   ·   registered: Dec. 17th, 2010
id 8449383
default

Ganondorf ( member #70843) posted at 5:24 PM on Thursday, October 17th, 2019

Great. I'd rather be wrong if it means things are ok, haha.

Legit forgot my DD and divorce and I'm fine with that.

posts: 196   ·   registered: Jun. 24th, 2019
id 8453633
This Topic is Archived
Cookies on SurvivingInfidelity.com®

SurvivingInfidelity.com® uses cookies to enhance your visit to our website. This is a requirement for participants to login, post and use other features. Visitors may opt out, but the website will be less functional for you.

v.1.001.20250404a 2002-2025 SurvivingInfidelity.com® All Rights Reserved. • Privacy Policy