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Newest Member: DCS72

The Book Club :
Infidelity crisis by Katie Coston

Topic is Sleeping.
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 Itdoesntmatter (original poster member #63380) posted at 11:25 PM on Saturday, June 2nd, 2018

Has anyone read : Infidelity Crisis: How to Gain Forgiveness and Respect After Your Affair." I came across this title on DearPeggy.

Any feedback would be appreciated.

BS (me)

posts: 186   ·   registered: Apr. 9th, 2018   ·   location: somewhere, in what feels like hell
id 8178218
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UKgirl ( member #17062) posted at 6:28 PM on Friday, June 8th, 2018

As I remember, it's a book written for the WS, so I didn't read it, although I read plenty of others.

This was the only book my fWH read and he used it to write a timeline and to answer my questions that he had refused to fully address before. He positively rejected anything to do with infidelity on the basis that he knew what he had done and he knew how to deal with it better than anyone else. I think the book was a little bit of an eye-opener for him.

I reckon the main reason he read this one was because it was short!!

Affair1: Dday 30/07/06 LTA: 5yrs ex-fiancee Affair2: Dday 04/09/20 9mths another XHSgf.Me/BS, still young. Him/WS, old. 4 grown boysHaving an affair because you are unhappy is like eating Ex-lax because you are hungry - unfound's mom

posts: 4045   ·   registered: Nov. 17th, 2007   ·   location: UK
id 8182419
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 Itdoesntmatter (original poster member #63380) posted at 5:35 PM on Saturday, June 9th, 2018

WH is reading it now, I read the intro and stopped where she said that BS should not read any further. I guess I can ask WH to read the Linda McDonald book next and tell me how they are different.

I was just curious as I have not seen it recommended to WH and from what little I read, I thought it was good.

BS (me)

posts: 186   ·   registered: Apr. 9th, 2018   ·   location: somewhere, in what feels like hell
id 8182995
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WhatsRight ( member #35417) posted at 6:13 PM on Saturday, June 9th, 2018

...I read the intro and stopped where she said that BS should not read any further...

???????????????

Just trying to understand WHY a BS should not read any further.

"Noone can make you feel inferior without your concent." Eleanor Roosevelt

I will not be vanquished. Rose Kennedy

posts: 8235   ·   registered: Apr. 23rd, 2012   ·   location: Southeast USA
id 8183010
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 Itdoesntmatter (original poster member #63380) posted at 10:42 PM on Thursday, June 21st, 2018

Her argument is that then the BS will have a certain set of expectations and if the WS fails to implement all the ideas...it would cause issues, like disappointment or something along those lines.

I personally chose not to read it, because I have enough of books to read on my own healing process. I was just wondering how it stacks up to the Linda McDonald, that is all.

BS (me)

posts: 186   ·   registered: Apr. 9th, 2018   ·   location: somewhere, in what feels like hell
id 8191558
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UKgirl ( member #17062) posted at 11:53 AM on Saturday, June 23rd, 2018

I've just googled Linda MacDonald and can I assume you are talking about the author who has written "Meeting Lydia" and three others on the same characters?

If this is the case, I don't see how they would compare since the MacDonald book set is fiction and the Katie Coston is a kind of therapist talking directly to the adulterer, as if in IC. I thought it was the kind of book fWH might just about manage, but it did take quite a while before he actually came around to grasping what he had to do and why. He just wanted it all to go away! I did read it myself some time later and thought it gave sound advice and a good degree of understanding.

Thanks for the name though - I've just ordered Meeting Lydia from Amazon. FWH met up with MOW through Friends Reunited..... Not pain-shopping or picking at scabs and scars, just trying to comprehend the incomprehensible even after all these years.

Affair1: Dday 30/07/06 LTA: 5yrs ex-fiancee Affair2: Dday 04/09/20 9mths another XHSgf.Me/BS, still young. Him/WS, old. 4 grown boysHaving an affair because you are unhappy is like eating Ex-lax because you are hungry - unfound's mom

posts: 4045   ·   registered: Nov. 17th, 2007   ·   location: UK
id 8192626
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gtflng ( member #63002) posted at 3:11 PM on Saturday, June 23rd, 2018

Linda MacDonald - How to Help Your Spouse Heal from Your Affair

posts: 690   ·   registered: Mar. 11th, 2018
id 8192686
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gmc94 ( member #62810) posted at 5:04 PM on Friday, July 6th, 2018

So - did anyone read the entire Coston book?

Helpful?

M >25yrs/grown kids
DD1 1994 ONS prostitute
DD2 2018 exGF1 10+yrEA & 10yrPA... + exGF2 EA forever & "made out" 2017
9/18 WH hung himself- died but revived

It's rude to say "I love you" with a mouthful of lies

posts: 3828   ·   registered: Feb. 22nd, 2018
id 8201095
Topic is Sleeping.
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