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GW. Your WW should be like a construction truck for you. You should see the do not follow sign on the back.

Your wife is on a roller coaster hating you and then hating you less (no sign of love in the coaster) If you still entertain the idea of R make sure you go to the extreme and she fully realize the depth of her betrayal and face the full consequences leading to genuine remorse. Right now I think her hanging around the house while bidding for the POSOM (most of the time) is keeping you on the edge.

Ok it was just a thought. If she could actually hear what this guy is like direct from the voices of these OBS's (by having them call her) I thought it would become more real to her.

Especially if any of them left a good relationship while under his control and later figured out what she had done and lost once he revealed himself as a douche bag and she realized what an idiot she had been.

Anyway I won't distract you any more. You are doing great.

[This message edited by Stevesn at 12:49 PM, September 10th (Sunday)]

She won't entertain that right now. The stress is bad enough for her. I'll keep pressure steady until she pops. I have already caused a fracture between them by moving back into my own home. She admitted as much. And the constant fear they both are experiencing is awesome to me.

There is a saying: The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence. I have read a lot of stories where the WS went to live with the other person and then realizes the mistake as they see the other person isn't better or even worse then the BS. Then often they fully realize what they have done and they can't go back anymore. But i believe not many wayward spouses realizes this during the affair.

I have a theory that may explain your WW's way of thinking.

She probably thinks OM is her soulmate , and that they were always meant to be together. The reason his other marriages didn't work out was because he never got over her (WW). To your WW, it's not because he's cheating lying douche. So his track record of a dozen other marriages that have failed, is only serving to strengthen her fantasy that she is the one that's meant to be with him, and the one to settle him down.

The only reason I present this to you, is for further proof that as far as she is concerned, the M is over, not that you necessarily needed more proof.

It will take a miracle to snap her out of her fantasyland.

Her sweet, financially secure future with Navy boy is looking bleaker by the hour.

Look forward to her having a major emotional event; she's cornered.

Reality is a bitch.

[This message edited by MidnightRun at 1:52 PM, September 10th (Sunday)]

Fully expecting the meltdown any day. I keep presssure on him as well. Simple little texts like fridays- " it's my turn motherfucker" that drive him nuts. He called her right away at work freaked out. Lol

Let that be your last contact with Navy boy.

No intimidation on your part is paramount.

His ass is about to hit stormy seas, and he knows it.

Along with your congressional delegation, have at the ready the military affairs editors at the Louisville Courier Journal and the Cincinnati Enquirer.

They'd love to hear Navy boy's description of submarine operations given to his married lover.

[This message edited by MidnightRun at 2:38 PM, September 10th (Sunday)]

Oh man, don't text him at all.

Yes friend. Best NC w him.

Simple little texts like fridays- " it's my turn motherfucker" that drive him nuts. He called her right away at work freaked out. Lol

I love how you are putting the screws to that shitbag. But, yeah, you should probably make that your last one to him then teach him what it's really like to run silent and deep. Trust me, you want him relaxed and thinking everything has blown over, like the eye of the hurricane, while the other side of that wall is about to hit him with with a full on investigation.

"Run silent and deep."

I like it.

Gw,

You've done well (actually extremely well) in getting things to the point where the two of them are self destructing at an increasing rate. I agree. Go NC w/ the OM. It is actually better that he eats himself alive from the inside out. He's doing it to himself w/ no further effort on your part.

The next stage is more important. Because it is about your kids. And your health and well being.

You have a complicated sitch trying to dovetail a bankruptcy into a D proceeding. All of that has to be laid out in a way that keeps the house for your family (you and the kids). You have a tough shift schedule that leaves you drained mentally and physically. That is on top of the A shitstorm.

As she continues to breakdown more and more you'll see opportunities to make some tactical moves that may help with your overall strategy.

I'm thinking along the lines of a separation agreement (even just verbal between the two of you) where she stays in the house w/the kids during your long shift work days. Then she goes to somewhere (Dad's?) on your days off. She's so messed up in the head right now that you might get away with telling her that a break like that for her will help her stress/anxiety. And allow her more private time to support the OM. This is a low risk, non threatening move toward her. She gets the kids, your *thinking* of her, and it give you time away from her.

Hey, your a trained, experienced LEO. You've made lots of perps think you were their best friend.

Mainly I want to say that you've gone from zero to sixty in way less than 4.0!

And that I believe you should shift your focus away from OM. And away from your WW unless it suits your purposes. The real prize is your kids, to make sure they have a stable home life with you.

Everybody here has your back.

Well I failed too see your responses in time. I gave her an opportunity to dump him and work on the family and she refused. So I hit him up one more time. That will be the last. Didn't offer insight to him just said I was sending her ass to him and enjoy. Told him it was my turn to truly enjoy.

Just to remove temptation I deleted his number. She still says if I turn him in she'll hate me forever. Childish playground threat I told her

For some reason she keeps crying whenever we have a discussion. Any idea why?

She still says if I turn him in she'll hate me forever

you should say from what you have done to us it makes no difference. Hope you give up on her. She has turned in to construction truck with full of junk.

crying probably she like cake

[This message edited by goalong at 5:59 PM, September 10th (Sunday)]

Why are you having discussions?

180

Shark man, it was over an article I gave her that describes what a person goes thru due to the others cheating. She read it and started a convo. I answered her questions and slipped. I lit into her. Just a backslide. Won't happen again.