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I Can Relate :
"I Can Relate" Forum

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so_sad_bs ( member #15636) posted at 10:41 PM on Monday, November 12th, 2007

Suggestion: Can we have a thread started on EAs? On a recent thread, Lalagirl (and several others including me) thought a separate forum might be nice, but until then, or instead, I think maybe an "I Can Relate" thread would suffice.

Thanks!

[This message edited by so_sad_bs at 4:44 PM, November 12th (Monday)]

BS (me), 35
FWH, 35
OW, married "friend" with 1 child
EA - 32 days
DDay - 8/2/2007
M 10 years, no kids
R in progress

posts: 90   ·   registered: Aug. 5th, 2007
id 2523193
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kxm00 ( member #14075) posted at 9:23 PM on Friday, November 16th, 2007

New Betrayed Men needed, please.

D-day: 6/25/06
D-day #2: 8/16/07 Found out for sure she was seeing another OM while we were deciding to divorce, separate or work on the marriage.

Divorced 3/5/08.

posts: 183   ·   registered: Mar. 26th, 2007   ·   location: PA
id 2535007
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Equalizing ( new member #16895) posted at 12:01 PM on Monday, November 19th, 2007

have you started a new thread on LTA's? i don't see it here.

Be kinder than neccesary.

posts: 12   ·   registered: Nov. 5th, 2007   ·   location: fl
id 2539745
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STAND ( member #16442) posted at 5:49 PM on Monday, November 19th, 2007

Can I ask for this again?

Can there be something for the BS who's SO is spending time with Prostitutes, in Strip Clubs, and Massage Parlors??

ONS's just doesn't cut it for me. There's no OW around to deal with. There's just a history of hookers.

"Is my life a comedy or a tragedy? If only I could decide than I could dress accordingly." - Ashleigh Brilliant

posts: 938   ·   registered: Oct. 2nd, 2007
id 2540634
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painfullylost ( new member #18000) posted at 4:54 PM on Thursday, January 31st, 2008

Is there ANYBODY out there that has had to deal with mental illness and infidelity? Borderline Personality Disorder?

posts: 5   ·   registered: Jan. 30th, 2008   ·   location: Michigan
id 2731612
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jolene ( member #17993) posted at 11:30 AM on Sunday, February 24th, 2008

What about infidelity in which there is a CHILD who is disabled/has chronic illness?

I know that is quite the buzzkill, but it's what I'm facing.

Divorced 10/2013! Don't let the door hit ya where the good Lord split ya!

posts: 2189   ·   registered: Jan. 30th, 2008   ·   location: btn rock and hard place
id 2804027
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FeistyWoman ( member #19093) posted at 2:57 AM on Saturday, April 12th, 2008

I see a couple of requests for a thread relating to SO's going to prostitutes, massage parlors, etc.

I could really use some support from others who have been through this. Could we get one started?

Me - BS
Him - WH (SA)
Dday #1 3-20-08 Dday #2 4-9-08
2 children
Married 11 years, together 20
Him-3 massage parlor visits starting 1996; 1 yr arrangement w/prostitute;6 ONS(women); 1 full massage with man
Me-Totally clueless until 3-20-08

posts: 111   ·   registered: Apr. 11th, 2008   ·   location: Midwest
id 2936565
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Carmela ( new member #19527) posted at 6:23 PM on Wednesday, May 14th, 2008

I don't know how to be to my spouse now that I have found out about the affair. How do I act? Mad, sad, mean, nice, not sure what is best!

posts: 1   ·   registered: May. 14th, 2008
id 3019468
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Fallen ( member #4313) posted at 6:25 PM on Wednesday, May 14th, 2008

(((Carmela))) Welcome to SI.

You might want to post your story in the Just Found Out forum so that more people will see it.

Is the A over?

You can't heal what you won't feel.

"There would be no grand absolution, only forgiveness meted out in these precious sips. It would well up from his heart in spoonfuls, and he would feed it to me. And it would be enough."

posts: 23510   ·   registered: May. 7th, 2004
id 3019479
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dorada ( new member #19866) posted at 5:01 PM on Friday, June 13th, 2008

my h had a baby with his A in front of my eyes..not knowing it was his of course...she is 28 and i am 46...he is 40...she is young and pretty and im overweight...and i can no longer have children ( three and a first divorce was enouwgh).she was pretending to be my friend as she was having my H`s baby....making me feel her belly as the baby grew...now pease tell that is the sickest thing possible...we are back together again ,the baby is a year old, but things are going good for us...it`s just that i still feel humiliation at being so stupid when in fact i had doughts. they spent 9 months with straight faces and i cant beleive 2 people can do that...she breast fed in my home...i found out the baby was 9 months old....she is no longer in his life and lives in another country so i know there`s nc, but i still feel fat and ugly and old...has someone else`s H had a baby with his A. tell me how you felt about all of it...thanks

Posts: 4 | Registered: Jun 2008

posts: 44   ·   registered: Jun. 13th, 2008
id 3097133
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auntcis ( member #15926) posted at 5:06 PM on Friday, June 13th, 2008

There is a thread here for BW who's H had another child from the A. There are quite a few of us. My H had OC from his A we have no contact with OW/OC. It has made R very tough, since now there will froever be a reminder of H A. The women in the OC thread have helped me quite a bit. Stop by there if you need to.

Me;36FBS,Him;31FWH,married 14yrs
D14,S12,S8,OC13
OC was adopted 8/13/09
"Lucky I'm in love with my best friend."

posts: 3519   ·   registered: Aug. 24th, 2007   ·   location: New York
id 3097144
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Dreamboat ( member #10506) posted at 3:29 AM on Saturday, June 21st, 2008

Mods,

I would like to request a thread for Parents whose X's have abandoned kids (or maybe "Absent Parent" or something like that). There seems to be many of us in D/S dealing with this, or whose X's seem to be headed that way.

I feel like this thread could be a place where we can support each other and trade ideas to help our kids deal with the pain of having an absent parent.

I would like this because it is hard to remember which parents are dealing with an absent parent and it is hard to tell which threads are focused on that (from the title anyway).

Thank you for taking this into consideration.

DreamBoat

And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back
So shake him off
-- Shake It Out, Florence And The Machine

posts: 17695   ·   registered: Apr. 25th, 2006   ·   location: A better place :)
id 3115572
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Dreamboat ( member #10506) posted at 4:31 AM on Saturday, June 21st, 2008

Mods,

I would like to request a thread for Parents whose X's have abandoned kids (or maybe "Absent Parent" or something like that). There seems to be many of us in D/S dealing with this, or whose X's seem to be headed that way.

I feel like this thread could be a place where we can support each other and trade ideas to help our kids deal with the pain of having an absent parent.

I would like this because it is hard to remember which parents are dealing with an absent parent and it is hard to tell which threads are focused on that (from the title anyway).

Thank you for taking this into consideration.

DreamBoat

In addition there are also several posters how had a parent leave them behind. I know several who have helped me in the past, so I would not want to create a thread where they did not feel comfortable posting.

And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back
So shake him off
-- Shake It Out, Florence And The Machine

posts: 17695   ·   registered: Apr. 25th, 2006   ·   location: A better place :)
id 3115687
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lonely&depressed ( member #19779) posted at 5:28 PM on Wednesday, June 25th, 2008

Mods.........I think a Retaliatory Affair thread should be added.

posts: 157   ·   registered: Jun. 5th, 2008   ·   location: New York
id 3125184
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sickwith4kids ( member #16585) posted at 1:38 AM on Thursday, July 31st, 2008

A thread for people who had an addiction to texting/chatting? Not emotional affairs just addicted to the communication?

me (BS)-34 Him (FWH)-35
married 11 years (together 14)

DDay 10/07/2007
trickle truth for one month
kids S-9 D-7 S-5 D-2
...because it was us baby way before them and we're still together. ~REO Speedwagon~

posts: 350   ·   registered: Oct. 12th, 2007   ·   location: Ohio
id 3204193
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lonely&depressed ( member #19779) posted at 2:51 AM on Friday, August 1st, 2008

What about the topic of retalitory affairs.

posts: 157   ·   registered: Jun. 5th, 2008   ·   location: New York
id 3206976
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beach ( member #7533) posted at 6:53 PM on Friday, October 24th, 2008

Can we have a new thread to work on "Low Self-esteem" for many of us? Please let me know.

Thanks!

[This message edited by beach at 12:54 PM, October 24th (Friday)]

If you don't find peace with yourself, you cannot find anywhere else.
Appreciate and cherish what I have.

posts: 8680   ·   registered: Jul. 4th, 2005   ·   location: midwest
id 3363980
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gburg ( new member #21400) posted at 6:36 PM on Monday, October 27th, 2008

I'm sorry folks but how can I send a message to the moderator to post. I have a problem and would like opinions and help but don't know how to post it.

posts: 16   ·   registered: Oct. 27th, 2008   ·   location: USA
id 3369481
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deeplysad ( member #16590) posted at 11:10 PM on Monday, October 27th, 2008

Go into the General Forum and ask to have a mod send you a PM (private message) and whoever is "on duty" will contact you.

Me: BW - I'm much too young to feel this damn old
Him: FWH - Midlife crisis with a pathetic porn wannabe
D-Day: August 2004; Lots of false R until February 2005.

It takes all kinds of kinds....Miranda Lambert

posts: 3413   ·   registered: Oct. 12th, 2007   ·   location: So Calif
id 3370125
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HoBeGone ( new member #21567) posted at 8:49 PM on Tuesday, November 11th, 2008

I would like to make a suggestion.

When a new thread is started on a topic - can a link to the "old" thread be posted in the first message?

And perhaps a link to the NEW thread on the 'old' one before locking it?

Me - 35F - BS - Smart, Beautiful, Faithful
Him - 29M - WS - Asshole, Diagnosed Sex Addict
Son - 5
Together 7.5 years, Married 5.5 years


posts: 31   ·   registered: Nov. 9th, 2008
id 3402534
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