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Newest Member: Daughterofthemosthigh

Divorce/Separation :
Advice for child custody issues and when being deposed?

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ThisIsSoLonely ( Guide #64418) posted at 9:30 PM on Tuesday, May 28th, 2024

EDIT - sorry I didn't see that your depo already happened. Glad it seemed to go well.

As an attorney who used to depose people as a large part of my practice (I am no longer in private practice) my advice to you would be the same as to everyone I deposed: 1) tell the truth, 2) keep your emotions in check, 3) if you do not understand the question OR (more likely) if the way the question is phrased could be interpreted as asking two different things, ask for clarity, 4) take your time, 5) don't start speaking until the question is completely finished and your attorney has time to object, and 6) limit your responses to answering the question as asked (AKA don't inadvertently "help" the other side).

The last one first - It's natural to anticipate a question when the first few words come out of someone's mouth - and normally we are right. But, for clarity of the record, and so you don't end up offering the opposing side information they do not otherwise have, wait until the person asking the questions is done - it also helps you if you need to ask for clarity. As for the rest, most of us, when in a weird situation like a deposition, are nervous - because being deposed is a nerve wracking thing - and when nervous, most of us tend to talk faster and ramble a bit. I know I do. So SLOW YOURSELF DOWN. Take deep breaths - have some water nearby and take a few sips from time to time. And do not feel any pressure to spit out an answer. If deposing counsel looks like or otherwise pressures you to answer quickly, take as many long pauses as you like, and feel free to ask them to repeat the question.

Deposition styles are wildly different from attorney to attorney. In some of the most contentious matters I had, the depos were respectful and relatively easy. In some of the easiest "slam dunk" cases I had the deposing attorney was an ____hole throughout (and appeared to be that way on every case I had with them too). You never know until you get to one.

[This message edited by ThisIsSoLonely at 9:33 PM, Tuesday, May 28th]

You are the only person you are guaranteed to spend the rest of your life with. Act accordingly.

Constantly editing posts: usually due to sticky keys on my laptop or additional thoughts

posts: 2359   ยท   registered: Jul. 11th, 2018
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