Topic is Sleeping.
foundoutlater (original poster member #32900) posted at 9:45 PM on Sunday, September 24th, 2023
I'm not on here almost every anymore. I'm happy to be much further down the road the path of healing and doing well. Today I heard a song I've never heard before - "Lost" by Linkin Park. Even if you are not a fan of their stuff, it's worth a listen. It's not often a song resonates with my journey with infidelity so completely and this one spoke to exactly where I was for so long. Too long looking through my 20/20 hindsight glasses. I had a mental breakdown, and this song spoke about so much of why, and summarize it perfectly at the end of the song.
I'm lost in these memories
Living behind my own illusion
Lost all my dignity
Living inside my own confusion
When I figured out some things I was able to get back to my reality and live my life. It took an incredible amount of time, and spending way too much time in pain to get there, but I did. I was not not broken, I was incredibly hurt with some lifelong impacts. It felt mortal to me, for a long time, and it introduced an "understanding" of a couple things I could have lived with out (hate and why people feel like there is only one way out). Eventually I think most people will realize it's not your fault, they cheater did not think of you (one of the bazillion wounds to heal), and nothing you did created this mess. It does not fit everyone, but like everything on this site, take what you need and leave the rest.
Sorry for all those working through the pain. Just wanted to post something positive for the so many people in that "Lost" stage.
Your beliefs don’t make you a better person, your behavior does.
Tanner ( Guide #72235) posted at 9:56 PM on Sunday, September 24th, 2023
Thanks for sharing I will go check it out.
Dday Sept 7 2019 doing well in R BH M 32 years
Want2BHappyAgain ( member #45088) posted at 3:26 PM on Monday, September 25th, 2023
Thank you for sharing
!
That "Lost" stage is pure HELL
. I didn't know where to go...who to trust...and what to do next. But eventually I got my bearings...started on a PLAN...and worked my way OUT
. My plan changed and evolved over time...but that is the beauty of a plan. It isn't set in stone...it is more like a guideline
.
Eventually I think most people will realize it's not your fault, they cheater did not think of you (one of the bazillion wounds to heal), and nothing you did created this mess. It does not fit everyone, but like everything on this site, take what you need and leave the rest.
EXACTLY!! We all heal at different paces and in different ways. The advice on here that works for some may not work for others...and that is perfectly FINE
.
A "perfect marriage" is just two imperfect people who refuse to give up on each other.
With God ALL things are possible (Matthew 19:26)
I AM happy again...It CAN happen!!!
From respect comes great love...sassylee
Bor9455 ( member #72628) posted at 3:33 PM on Monday, September 25th, 2023
Lost is a song that apparently was recorded by the band in the early 2000s, I believe the Meteora album, but because they had other tracks they felt great about, they didn't include it. Chester of course has been gone a few years now, but the rest of the band was working on the 20th anniversary for that album and and someone, not sure who whether it was the band members, Chester's family or someone else dug up the track and they released it this year. Apparently, as the story goes according to Mike Shinoda, that track was cut from the album release in favor of "Numb" because both tracks were similar tonally. I wondered why when I heard it that the song took me back to those early days of the band, and that is because it was recorded 20 some years ago and released this year. So that is why you may never have heard the song until now, it wasn't released until recently.
Myself - BH & WH - Born 1985 Her - BW & WW - Born 1986
D-Day for WW's EA - October 2017D-Day no it turned PA - February 01, 2020
Topic is Sleeping.