Cookies are required for login or registration. Please read and agree to our cookie policy to continue.

Newest Member: May28

Reconciliation :
Therapy

Topic is Sleeping.
default

 Rolltide9630 (original poster new member #80796) posted at 4:53 AM on Wednesday, September 13th, 2023

I’m a BS trying R with my WW. I am going to start IC and would like some advice on what to look for in a therapist. My WW is already in IC.
I’m having a tough time with everything.
Any advice on picking a therapist?

posts: 6   ·   registered: Aug. 31st, 2022   ·   location: AL
id 8807581
default

leafields ( Guide #63517) posted at 6:23 AM on Wednesday, September 13th, 2023

If you can find a betrayal trauma specialist with infidelity experience, you hit the jackpot. EMDR can be helpful for certain scenarios.

But find somebody who is a good fit for you.

BW M 34years, Dday 1: March 2018, Dday 2: August 2019, D final 2/25/21

posts: 3441   ·   registered: Apr. 21st, 2018   ·   location: Washington State
id 8807582
default

HardKnocks ( member #70957) posted at 7:19 PM on Wednesday, September 13th, 2023

Congratulations on making that decision! It was certainly a game-changer for me (and hopefully mine).

As has been mentioned, a betrayal trauma therapist is a good bet, as is someone with infidelity experience. You have a right to interview the therapist.

But some of what makes the experience worthwhile is going to be subjective; it's really a matter of a good fit.

Ask yourself how you feel during the session, and especially at the end. Do you feel relieved? Heard? A little hopeful?

You'll eventually want a treatment plan that outlines your short and long-term goals. But that usually comes after you're happy with the fit.

Bring all your questions to the group. People here can try to help you sort it.

BW
Recovered
Reconciled

posts: 552   ·   registered: Jul. 7th, 2019
id 8807656
default

 Rolltide9630 (original poster new member #80796) posted at 4:00 AM on Friday, September 15th, 2023

Thanks everyone, I’m looking now. I’ll let you know how it’s going.

posts: 6   ·   registered: Aug. 31st, 2022   ·   location: AL
id 8807877
default

leafields ( Guide #63517) posted at 4:37 AM on Friday, September 15th, 2023

Your employer may have an Employee Assistance Program (EAP) that allows you to have a few free sessions. Check with your insurance to see who is within your network. Almost everybody has a website, so check them out. See who appeals to you in their philosophy and see if they have openings.

My second therapist specialized in grief and betrayal trauma, among other things. She didn't have infidelity as a specialization, but was so helpful in my healing journey.

BW M 34years, Dday 1: March 2018, Dday 2: August 2019, D final 2/25/21

posts: 3441   ·   registered: Apr. 21st, 2018   ·   location: Washington State
id 8807881
default

Stillconfused2022 ( member #82457) posted at 3:52 PM on Friday, September 15th, 2023

There has been extensive research done studying the outcomes in psychotherapy attempting to determine which factors contribute to the highest success in terms of overall improvement in patient/client wellbeing. The data consistently shows that the primary determinant of the outcome is the relationship/bond between the therapist and the client. There is little distinction between the different types of therapy (CBT, DBT, insight oriented, TF-CBT, EMDR) in terms of how well you do. But there is a big distinction between doing therapy with someone you can connect with and someone you can’t. It is completely okay to interview different therapists, i.e. meet with them for a one hour introductory session, and then decide which one you connect with the best.

[This message edited by Stillconfused2022 at 3:53 PM, Friday, September 15th]

posts: 376   ·   registered: Nov. 27th, 2022   ·   location: Northeast
id 8807997
Topic is Sleeping.
Cookies on SurvivingInfidelity.com®

SurvivingInfidelity.com® uses cookies to enhance your visit to our website. This is a requirement for participants to login, post and use other features. Visitors may opt out, but the website will be less functional for you.

v.1.001.20240523a 2002-2024 SurvivingInfidelity.com® All Rights Reserved. • Privacy Policy