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Newest Member: Col2gar6681

New Beginnings :
In need of mojo to stick to my gut feeling.

Topic is Sleeping.

 Charity411 (original poster member #41033) posted at 6:57 PM on Sunday, May 21st, 2023

Homewrecked, you are right. They are very similar. I met him in the beginning when I worked for city hall and he was the building inspector. In hindsight it was the perfect job for him, because he got to tell people what to do. No matter what people wanted to do to their buildings, he told them why they were wrong and his way was the only way. He would spend hours researching any tiny thing in the ordinances that proved them wrong. He dd it in a cajoling salesman like way, but he was eventually let go for that reason, because the mayor got tired of the complaints.

I started to notice exactly what you are describing even before Christmas night and the first Jamaica pitch. We got on the subject of investing taxpayer funds due to what our library district was doing, and I pointed out they were investing in something that while probably safe, it didn't meet the state statutes because it wasn't FDIC insured. He told me I was wrong. I pointed out (although he already knew) that I was the finance director of our city for 25 years and I knew I was right. He persisted in setting me straight by saying I was probably not exposed to enough information to make that assessment. I pointed out that I was on the board of directors of a statewide Municipal Treasurers Association and sat through presentations by our State Treasurer about sound municipal investing practices, so I had plenty of information. He finally shut up. That was when my gut stated talking loudly.

posts: 1728   ·   registered: Oct. 18th, 2013   ·   location: Illinois
id 8791940

nekorb ( member #40306) posted at 2:33 AM on Monday, May 22nd, 2023

Stick to your guns. Nice guy or not sounds like you need to go no contact. At all.

Me: BS 44; Him: WH 47 M - 22 Years
D-day: 7/2013; D filed 7/2014; Divorced 7-27-16
...the WS affair starts off in a dreamland where everything is all Golly, Wow! and Meant To Be! and Soul Mates drop from the trees to frolic in the mist. -devotedman

posts: 5731   ·   registered: Aug. 13th, 2013
id 8791969

EvenKeel ( member #24210) posted at 12:25 PM on Tuesday, May 23rd, 2023

So happy to read your update!!!

Just keep saying to yourself: "I do not want to have a collection of red flags"


posts: 6884   ·   registered: May. 31st, 2009   ·   location: Pennsylvania
id 8792141

WhoTheBleep ( member #49504) posted at 6:04 PM on Tuesday, May 23rd, 2023

Very late to this thread. Well done, Charity! Bullet dodged! Great advice given by all. This tidbit made me spit out my drink:

PS: If he needs a demonstration in what real anger, bitterness, and immaturity looks like, maybe we could do an interpretative dance or puppet show to help him understand? (Jerk).

🤣🤣🤣🤣 Chili!

I believe we have two lives: the one we learn with, and the one we live with after that. --The Natural

posts: 4513   ·   registered: Sep. 6th, 2015   ·   location: USA
id 8792185

 Charity411 (original poster member #41033) posted at 2:07 AM on Wednesday, May 24th, 2023

You people kill me sometimes. There has been zero contact. And I'm sticking to it.

And here's an added bonus and I swear you can't make this shit up. I've referred to my stalker. You can read about it in my profile. But this morning I got an email from a past coworker at City Hall. She wanted to know if I knew my stalker was dead. I did not. He's been in hiding from creditors so he's rarely here, but I saw his car late last week. It appears he came back to cut his grass because he got a citation from the city. He had a heart attack mowing his grass and died trying to get to his door.

So I feel so entirely free.

posts: 1728   ·   registered: Oct. 18th, 2013   ·   location: Illinois
id 8792269

leafields ( Guide #63517) posted at 6:16 AM on Tuesday, May 30th, 2023

Glad you're sticking to NC.

You're right - you can't make this shit up. I didn't realize you had a stalker,! That's crazy!

I hope you have peace and contentment in your life. Sounds like you deserve it.

BW M 34years, Dday 1: March 2018, Dday 2: August 2019, D final 2/25/21

posts: 3327   ·   registered: Apr. 21st, 2018   ·   location: Washington State
id 8793049

nothisfriend ( member #53171) posted at 4:23 PM on Tuesday, May 30th, 2023

OMG C-411! I hate to say I'm glad about something like that but how liberating for you!


Me: BS 50 (at the time) Him: WH 53 (at the time) D-Day: 10/25/15 Married: 28 years. One son, age 18 (at the time)
D final 2016 REMARRIED to a marvelous guy on 4/22/23

posts: 1293   ·   registered: May. 11th, 2016   ·   location: Illinois
id 8793082
Topic is Sleeping.
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