Last week has been a very good week for BH and I and last night was one of the better nights. Felt like we were companions and hanging out in our bedroom together as a cozy team. I blew it a bit today with a selfish comment I made... but, that's the ups and downs. Going to make it up to BH and show him a really good time out tonight.
Anyway, I had a really interesting dream last night. I dreamed I went to Russia and was in the desert- a barren lonely place with nothing but rocks and sand surrounding me. Then, I had to drive alll the way to China (yeah, it's a dream all right ). The road was just being paved, under construction, rocky and terrifying. Funny enough, I was in my own car (guess my Acadia is my dream car? ) In China, I was guided around by a Chinese person around some of the most beautiful places and gardens, seeing things my soul had longed to see. I was crying for joy in the dream. All the while, being mildly terrified of being a stranger in some very strange land, where I barely spoke the language and knew no one. I had to rely on my guide to get me where I needed to go so I could get home. Thing is, I never went home and never looked back.
I've been thinking about the dream all morning. It's a pretty good metaphor for my life. Starting out in a dangerous wasteland emotionally with my FOO. Then, a long and perilous road to a place of beauty, life and joy. A land I barely knew, but was joyful to be in. First time I remember crying tears of joy in any of my dreams.
Maybe things are shaping up in my life? I know BH isn't anywhere near satisfied with our M yet. Things are better. The good days are getting longer, the bad days shorter and father between.
Anyway, thought I'd share and maybe give somebody hope today.