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Newest Member: Starrystarrynight

New Beginnings :
Sally update!

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 SallyShrink81 (original poster member #50219) posted at 2:47 PM on Tuesday, October 8th, 2019

Hi everyone! It's been a while since I've posted or updated so I thought I'd give a shout out.

I've been doing fabulous!! The summer has been busy with a lot of big changes. FamilyGuy (my SO) and I moved in together to a new house about 30 minutes from my old place (Marital home ). Blending and moving has been rocky but we are weathering that storm very well. The new place has a beach association which we joined and everyone has been great so far! Haven't met a lot of families with kiddos yet but life has been very busy. I'm sure next summer being able to hang out at the beach will help tremendously.

I started my doctorate program at the end of August and I am LOVING IT!! I'm still seeing my IC just once a month though to touch base. FamilyGuy and I are attending couples therapy once a month as well to learn skills to keep our relationship strong.

XH continues to be the clueless idiot he is. I've taken a majority of custody of the kids for their well-being. XH "helps out" when he can but honestly it's the best thing for my kiddos so I don't mind... too much. FamilyGuy has been helping more as he and the kids are feeling comfortable with it. I basically feel like I don't even think about the infidelity or my XH because I've been focusing so much on my NB and enjoying my life.

FBS now surviving and thriving
2 kiddos born 2011 & 2014
"If a woman steals your husband, she might as well steal your shoes too, because one day she'll be walking in them." #karma

posts: 909   ·   registered: Nov. 4th, 2015   ·   location: Michigan
id 8449110
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Chili ( member #35503) posted at 4:15 PM on Tuesday, October 8th, 2019

Hey Sally girl!

So glad you posted an update - good to *see* you.

Sounds like much has been going on - so many great pieces to your new beginnings! I get the rockiness of blending and moving - heading into it with open eyes and an IC to help navigate is just so wise. I'm not sure it was ever going to be one of those things that could be defined as *perfect* or *without challenges.* (SO and I started seeing my longtime IC early on and still go in for maintenance as life just seems to require it from time to time).

Kudos on the doctorate program. I just love seeing folks here in their new beginnings embracing education - new careers - reinventing themselves. It's like on the other side they were finally able to get away from a toxic situation that never did allow them to be who they should have been all along. Keep us posted!

Not surprised that your Ex is still a clueless idiot. I am kind of encouraged that he has faded into the background and can't stink up things too too much.

Thanks for posting - continue to be good to yourself!

2012 pretty much sucked.
Things no longer suck.
Took off flying solo with the co-pilot chili dog.
"Life teaches you how to live it if you live long enough" - Tony Bennett

posts: 2242   ·   registered: May. 2nd, 2012   ·   location: Reality
id 8449166
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WhoTheBleep ( member #49504) posted at 6:11 PM on Tuesday, October 8th, 2019

. It's like on the other side they were finally able to get away from a toxic situation that never did allow them to be who they should have been all along.

^^^YESSSS, Chili!!!

I believe we have two lives: the one we learn with, and the one we live with after that. --The Natural

posts: 4526   ·   registered: Sep. 6th, 2015   ·   location: USA
id 8449228
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Phoenix1 ( member #38928) posted at 7:32 PM on Tuesday, October 8th, 2019

Great update, Sally! I'm glad your NB is still chugging along in a positive direction. Isn't it great when the infidelity nightmare is just an occasional passing thought?

Thanks for sharing!

fBS - Me
Xhole - Multiple LTAs/2 OCs over 20+yrs
Adult Kids
Happily divorced!

You can't go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending. ~C.S. Lewis~

posts: 9059   ·   registered: Apr. 9th, 2013   ·   location: Land of Indifference
id 8449270
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BrokenheartedUK ( member #43520) posted at 10:32 PM on Wednesday, October 9th, 2019

This is an awesome but not unexpected update!! So thrilled for you! Glad the doctorate has all worked out!!!!!

Me: BS
He cheated and then lied. Apparently cheaters lie. Huh. 13 months of false R. Divorced! 8/16 3 teenage kids
"The barn's burnt down
Now
I can see the moon"
-Mizuta Masahide

posts: 3432   ·   registered: May. 24th, 2014
id 8449840
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