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OrdinaryDude ( member #55676) posted at 7:32 PM on Wednesday, August 30th, 2017
HB is normal for many people, but eventually it does go away.
Life begins to return to normal, responsibilities, work stress, etc, can be held at bay for only so long.
It takes effort to maintain anything near that level of intensity, at least for me...my wife could kill me with sex if she wanted to, her drive is insane.
So don't take it too hard, it's different for everyone, just count yourself lucky to get to experience it at all, then work through the rest as you R.
I was young and dumb and stayed with a cheater.
sisoon ( Moderator #31240) posted at 11:30 PM on Wednesday, August 30th, 2017
I could not believe how great. Neither could my spouse.
It went on until I figured out that that is what the A's must have been like and it all suddenly stopped.
Are you sure that's what the As were like?
It sounds like one thing you need is for your W to open up about her experiences with cheating. Brings up too much sadness? She'll survive.
fBH (me) - on d-day: 66, Married 43, together 45, same sex apDDay - 12/22/2010Recover'd and R'edYou don't have to like your boundaries. You just have to set and enforce them.
iamanidiot (original poster member #47257) posted at 2:02 PM on Thursday, August 31st, 2017
Sisoon - No I'm not sure.
DDay opened up a can of worms and brought back a flood of memories. Like how ugly & indifferent she was to me and specifically how NICE she was to AP's.
Basically my experiences of the way she was, falling all over AP, in front of other friends. Mindless.
And those memories are all I have to base my assumption on.
As you suggest, maybe I should ask......
(As my previous boss once told me, that assume is spelt 'make an ASS of U & ME)
Me BS,57 Her WS,552 LTA & 2 ONS 30+years agoD-day 27/12/14At least I still have my sense of humor.I need it.Coming to grips with it all3 Adult childrenStill married
sisoon ( Moderator #31240) posted at 4:52 PM on Thursday, August 31st, 2017
Like how ugly & indifferent she was to me and specifically how NICE she was to AP's.
Yup. That got me, too. The only saving grace is that my W did it in private.
If your W does the necessary work, my bet is that she will treat you better than the aps, eventually. If she doesn't, well, you can find someone who will treat you well. And remember, the demographics are with you....
BTW, you're no idiot. Just sayin'....
fBH (me) - on d-day: 66, Married 43, together 45, same sex apDDay - 12/22/2010Recover'd and R'edYou don't have to like your boundaries. You just have to set and enforce them.
harrybrown ( member #59225) posted at 8:50 PM on Thursday, August 31st, 2017
Does she ever get how you feel?
Or is she still so selfish, like she was in the A?
She will not go back to it to help you heal?
When did she work on her selfish attitude?
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