SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

Thank you for posting this - my husband's email address came up. Not sure if I feel better having more confirmation or not?

Confused615 - it sounds as though he probably did have an account on AM but probably under a secret email account you never knew about. Sounds like he's nervous that perhaps you were able to tie him to that hidden email account somehow and have uncovered a secret he's been keeping.

Oldtimer97, I cannot access the website cited on page 1. I guess I just need to keep trying until the traffic slows down? I am dying to get the details since WH email address was on one of the search engines I could access with no details.

After D day and doing all my investigations I did try to log into an account with his email with no luck. I even tried to reset his password because I had access to his email so that the email to reset the password actually never came through. Or he beat me to the email accessing it from his smart phone when I was on the computer. Does anyone know if that could have caused his email to show up in the search engines or would he have definitely had to have a profile?

Confused615 - it sounds as though he probably did have an account on AM but probably under a secret email account you never knew about. Sounds like he's nervous that perhaps you were able to tie him to that hidden email account somehow and have uncovered a secret he's been keeping.

I think you're right.

Im going to start looking around again. Var, keylogger,etc.

Blah.

ETA: I haven't mentioned it to him at all, since I mentioned I was going to look for him there. He hasn't asked. I know he's wondering...and that's ok.

[This message edited by confused615 at 9:31 AM, August 20th (Thursday)]

confused,

My wife used an e-mail account that I had no idea she had when I discovered her on AM. She was savvy enough not to use any of her old e-mail accounts. And yes, the one she used is part of the dump. Never ends does it?

Never ends does it?

Well...SI has taught me...it ends when I say it does.

And, if I do find anything...it will end. I refuse to try again with a liar. He may not be cheating again...and I don't think he is. But if he lied to me about this..Im done.

Fortunately...SI taught me all about post-nups.

If I find anything..I will be fine. Him..not so much. But *I* will be just fine.

Im sorry your WW's email was in the dump. Though you knew it would be, it still has to sting.

ETA: I don't expect to find anything though. Any secret email account is long gone. The only way I will know is if he admits it..and that won't happen. Im still going to put the VAR in his car, and use the keylogger. Just in case.

[This message edited by confused615 at 9:45 AM, August 20th (Thursday)]

RANT! - I know the mods are locking down and only want one thread on this matter so hopefully this is the right place to post this. LOL

I wanted to write "can you guys believe this" But wait...I can believe. I swear nothing shocks me anymore.

There's a whole reddit board about how to LIE to your husband/wife and get away with having your email on the Ashley Madison hack list.

Like literally...tons of people comparing the best ways to neutralize the situation and get away with it.

One guy desperately said that all the members should all ban together and pay an IT guy to make fake lists they can show their betrayed, so that they are so LONG, the betrayed gives up and no longer wants to search for their Waywards name.

You want to create a fake data base with 30 million+ names? Jesus christ. Good luck to you. And I'm sorry, I'm like Macgyver. I'll find you no matter how many names you put on that list.

I'm a bit disappointed that several of my facebook friends (male and female) have posted about what a crime this is. "A breach of privacy" they cry.

One female friend compared it to having your tax documents or medical records exposed for all to see. Are you fucking kidding me?

Last time I checked, that information doesn't hurt anyone or involve anyone other than myself.

Why is it so easy for people to brush off cheating/cheaters and make excuses for them?

Sorry, but my "give a fuck" is broken. Actions have consequences. When you expose me to possible STD's, lie straight to my face, impact my living situation, my money situation, embarrass me publicly as I have to explain to some people what has happened and crush my soul all at the same time, you can fucking piss off. You're angry about your loss of privacy? These people have some damn nerve!

People are whining that they only set up AM accounts because they were bored, or had a momentary laps in judgement, but never actually cheated. Well you need to recognize that that's a slippery slope that you are bound to repeat and ACTUALLY follow through with unless you get some help and address the WHYS. And you know what...then confess that. Sign into your account and prove that to your wife/husband, and deal with the consequences. Do whatever you have to do to own your bad choice. Join SI and better yourself. You are one of the luckier ones then.

I am sorry today for my fellow SI members and the shit storm that we are all dealing with. I can deal with reading about the AM hack, but reading about peoples complete lack of understanding and compassion is just too much for me. You can tell the people who've either never dealt with cheating personally, or are cheaters themselves. Because no person who's been destroyed the way I have would post some ignorant shit comparing the AM hack to "Terrorism". Yes...a female friend of mine posted that. Talk about Trigger central.

and p.s. WBF and I searched together since he has 3 emails and he was not a member.

[This message edited by 4everfaithful83 at 10:04 AM, August 20th (Thursday)]

confused615 - you sound very "together" within yourself. I hope I can get there too.

Has anyone been able to get the encrypted data files? I really need to see this.

FYI 4everfaithful83 The Impact Team posted the following message for anyone to verify that the data they receive is valid.

"Any data not signed with key 6E50 3F39 BA6A EAAD D81D ECFF 2437 3CD5 74AB AA38 is fake"

@totallywounded...you will get there. Really. I know it seems like you will never be happy...really happy...again. But..you will.

(((totallywounded))))

[This message edited by katherine41 at 11:19 PM, August 21st (Friday)]

4everfaithful83-let the users on reddit create lists of fake names. I feel confident that there are plenty of pissed off stay at home moms who would love to spend their days reading through lists for legitimate names. Lol!

Regarding the AM breach, I have still not been able to get on the sites to check for my ws. But! Did you guys know that Adult Friend Finder had their database hacked and posted last May? Two of my asshole ws's old email addresses came up. Also a company called m spy got hacked, and their database was posted as well. Guess who I found? You got it? HE was watching ME???? I have to assume it was to see if I was onto his cheating.

SO went to the Data Is Beautiful subreddit and this was the top post:

http://dadaviz.com/s/ashley-madison-revealed

I'm a bit disappointed that several of my facebook friends (male and female) have posted about what a crime this is. "A breach of privacy" they cry.

Yeah those people get the smallest violin from me. Guess what? Probably shouldn't be on a site for MARRIED PEOPLE LOOKING TO CHEAT.

I honestly don't feel bad for any of them or their info being leaked. I know I probably should have a little compassion but I don't, at all.

[This message edited by crazyblindsided at 10:30 AM, August 20th (Thursday)]

found my WW acct and her toxic exBFFs account on there!

not a surprise. she told me about the AM acts when she confessed Dday

OMG think of all the poor people that are going to find their spouse in this database just out of curiosity? This site (SI) will be on overload!!

Dark Inertia interesting link!

My WH was not on the list. I tried all email addresses that I knew. I even told him I had the link so I would be checking.

He wasn't on there. But I think he is also smart not to use any of the email addresses I know. A phone number search would be better for me too, but then there is always a burner phone ugh!

I kindda wish the database said when they signed up - like how long ago. And the member's description of what they were looking for?

But maybe I shouldn't know these - might make me feel worse.

This article expresses my concerns about this pretty well:

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/morning-mix/wp/2015/08/19/dont-gloat-about-the-ashley-madison-leak-its-about-way-more-than-infidelity/?tid=pm_pop_b

The problem isn't "Internet Privacy" it's the idea that such a thing is or ever could be real.

Even the people who crack these (horribly insecure) DBs are not completely anonymous. There's no real anonymity, it's just a matter of how determined someone is to find out who you are.

This is why everyone should regularly change their passwords and store their password banks in a secure location, like the home safe where you keep birth certs. Especially if you use the same email, banking info, etc over a long period of time. Changing bank cards frequently isn't a bad idea either.

I have absolutely no sympathy whatsoever for people who signed onto a shady site in the first place, especially when the gang of fucking assholes is themselves in the first place engaged in facilitating a major breach of privacy. Maybe for those few people in countries where their lives are in danger due to their sexual preference but ffs, if you're under the death aegis why would you double down with a site like ALM in the first place? Because it's not like people engaged in actively betraying their spouses have demonstrated any real level of circumspection or respect for the well being of others.

So with those few outliers excepted, fuck them. This kind of shit happens to everyone, I'm not going to spare any sympathy here when there are millions of other people who are just plain not savvy and don't deserve to be victims of fraud or theft, rather than these dickheads out looking to commit fraud themselves anyway.

Both of my FWH's emails are confirmed. The genius used his main email account as well as the one he used for hook-ups. The skank's is also in their system. Oh well. Not my problem if he has repercussions.