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General :
Music triggers

Topic is Sleeping.
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 Groot1988 (original poster member #84337) posted at 1:29 PM on Monday, April 8th, 2024

Cedarwoods oh boy yes movies too!

I think H and I have watched maybe 5 together since DDay 6 months ago, we used to watch one a day. The things that bother me doesn’t always have to be cheating but of course that is a huge one, sex in movies triggers me especially if they are in places him and AP had sex! I am still terrified to hear her name in a movie or one time I broke down and had to turn it off because a man was just defending a woman and I spiraled. My H left us to fend a lot for ourselves last summer against neighbors who literally threatened our kids so my level of respect for him and trust to defend us is gone. (He’s slowly earning it back).
There is only one show that I can watch and truly forget about things and of all shows it’s South Park laugh , so he screens the episodes and then we binge, we even have two of the video games we play together. He always jokes about getting a tattoo of one of the characters because it was there for us in my darkest moments.
I used to lay in bed and watch king of the hill during the summer when he was out with AP and it is one of my fav shows but doubt I’ll ever watch it again.

Married 5 years (together 11) Four children Me Bs 36Him WH 35- 4 month PA Dday Oct 6- lots of TT final disclosure Jan 16.

"If we walk through hell we might as well hold hands, we should make this a home"- citizen soldier

posts: 465   ·   registered: Jan. 6th, 2024   ·   location: Darker side of gray
id 8832621
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sisoon ( Moderator #31240) posted at 3:01 PM on Monday, April 8th, 2024

Most video drama has been OK with me all along. We saw The Kids Are Alright (all right?) shortly after d-day, and I was OK with that, too.

As a PBS donor, I have access to some stuff on demand that they don't broadcast. We just started watching Nordic Noir. It's good drama, and has some good characters, but one of the main characters is a cheating W. That part is difficult to watch; I'm mainly waiting for her to get her comeuppance.. That character's mom killed her cheating H; I look at her very favorably. The show hurts, even now, but it's so good I have to watch it, at least up to the 1st 3-4 episodes.

fBH (me) - on d-day: 66, Married 43, together 45, same sex ap
DDay - 12/22/2010
Recover'd and R'ed
You don't have to like your boundaries. You just have to set and enforce them.

posts: 30544   ·   registered: Feb. 18th, 2011   ·   location: Illinois
id 8832634
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Vocalion ( member #82921) posted at 11:28 PM on Tuesday, April 9th, 2024

Regarding music that triggers negative émotions, I found that exposing myself To a number of songs which focus on infidelity has built up a tolerance to that musical theme. She's not the cheating kind and Behind closed doors amongst many others have lost much of their ability fire up the.old primitive brain synapses. My WW on the other hand still gets triggered by songs which cause her to relive feelings or shame and remorse. I have tried To let her know that we both need to move on. We are too old to get stuck now.

When she says you're the only one she'll ever love, and you find out, that you're not the one she's thinking of,That's when you're learning the game.Charles Hardin ( Buddy) Holly...December 1958

posts: 382   ·   registered: Feb. 22nd, 2023   ·   location: San Diego
id 8832864
Topic is Sleeping.
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