Letmebefrank ( member #86994) posted at 11:05 PM on Saturday, September 5th, 2026
Kole,
I’m sorry your kids have to be put through this. It’s very hard, but it sounds like you’re handling it the best you can.
There are a few things I think you should consider doing:
1) get tested for STDs.
2) find out if the AP is married. If yes, then you should inform her. It’s the right thing to do - she deserves to know that her husband cheated on her, the same way you deserved to know the truth.
3) are you sure the affair is over? It sounds like it, but if it’s not, that could factor into what you tell your children. I think they might feel badly used if they are allowed to meet mommy’s new friend, and he acts all friendly and gives them presents etc. only to find out later that he was the reason their family was torn apart.
