need2bfree (original poster member #55895) posted at 12:24 AM on Tuesday, January 21st, 2025
So he got ED pills without me knowing, there are 16 missing and he still says they never had sex. Says he doesnt know why they arent all there. I think hes trying to drive me crazy. Then he leaves to go to a hotel all incensed for questioning his honesty. Its only been a week and he thinks he has a right to be indignant? Im so tired. I just dont think I can do this.
leafields ( Guide #63517) posted at 2:16 AM on Tuesday, January 21st, 2025
So sorry, N2BF. Sending strength.
He wants you to believe something like some random stranger came into your house, found where he kept his ED drugs, and then took 16...all without ransacking the house?
Why don't you have a consultation with a lawyer or three and see what S or D would look like? You don't have to do any of those, but having the knowledge may help you feel stronger.
BW M 34years, Dday 1: March 2018, Dday 2: August 2019, D final 2/25/21
The1stWife ( Guide #58832) posted at 3:20 AM on Tuesday, January 21st, 2025
You know the truth.
Stop playing his warped stupid twisted Game.
Read up on the 180 and start detaching from him. It’s a way to protect yourself.
Survived two affairs and brink of Divorce. Happily reconciled. 11 years out from Dday. Reconciliation takes two committed people to be successful.
AnnieOakley ( member #13332) posted at 5:01 AM on Tuesday, January 21st, 2025
I agree, yes, he is trying to make you crazy by gaslighting. Like we haven’t seen condoms mysteriously disappear as well. With no explanation-that is remotely believable.
Detach, 180, IC, lawyer, etc. please put yourself first. He is a liar.
Me= BSHim=xWH (did the work & became the man I always thought he was, but it was too late)M=23+,T=27+dday=7/06, 8/09 (pics at a work function), 11/09 VAR, 6/12 Sep'd, 10/14 Divorced."If you are going through hell, keep going."
Cooley2here ( member #62939) posted at 5:12 PM on Tuesday, January 21st, 2025
There is conversation on here periodically about whether a WS, cheater, loves their spouse while they’re active in affairs. I don’t think they stop long enough to think about love. It sure does not sound like your husband loves you because he’s perfectly OK with lying to you and making you feel stupid. That’s not love. That’s cruelty. It seems as if he just doesn’t care and I find that so egregious. You’ve put your heart and soul into this relationship and he stomped all over it. Don’t let him play games with you. That’s what he’s doing and you’re online asking us. You know exactly what you know, you just do not want to admit it. He’s cheating on you.
See an attorney to find out what your options are if you choose to separate. See a doctor about medications if you need something for anxiety and sleep. Make sure you eat healthy foods. If you’re having trouble use something like Ensure to get some nutrition in.
When things go wrong, don’t go with them. Elvis
