SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

Hey all! I do not post often, but wished to have a place I could go back to and update for myself to see how far I've come. My divorce from ExWH went through in September 2023, and since then things have become steadier and less stressful. There have been many improvements in my life since ExWH yeeted himself from our home for the COW.

-I started a second part time job in December 2022 that I enjoy being at. I've been there over a year now and thoroughly enjoy my coworkers and the environment. In essentials, I'm working the two part time jobs so that I can still be there for my child when he's not at school. The income from both has been helping us become more stable.

-My son started Kindergarden and - while he's having some issues socially - seems to be doing very well academically. I'm thankful that his teachers and the school are great at communicating with parents on issues. We are working on getting him an IEP so that he can thrive.

-I've found I can fix a lot of things myself! I used to wait around begging EXWH to help me find solutions to fixing things (mainly because he'd give me hell when things needed to be fixed) and he'd blatantly ignore the problems, or get upset at me wanting to fix them in the first place. Now I know places I can call for repairs for the home and have managed to do minor car/house fixes on my own. It's lovely not having someone say I am a bad person for getting things done because it makes them feel guilt.

-There's less chores needing to be done in the home. With EXWH not in the house my chore load has gone down significantly. Less laundry, less trash, the house is cleaner. Because of this -despite being a single parent - I have far more me time and am able to do things I enjoy doing. Even my son has gotten better at helping take care of the home.

-I no longer care who the ex hangs out with. I also no longer care about the ex friends who ghosted me/my child. It's rather freeing to no longer be setting myself on fire trying to please these people. The ex still does everything he can to please them - including skipping out on his supervised visitation with our kid - but this is no longer my problem. I've stopped expecting these people to act like reasonable, respectable, or responsible adults. His friends can continue being my ex's chaos janitor while I go off to make a happy memory with my kid.

"There's less chores needing to be done in the home. With EXWH not in the house my chore load has gone down significantly. Less laundry, less trash, the house is cleaner."

Amazing how much easier my life is too without WexH

Like you said, steadier, less stressful

Wishing you continued peace and happiness

Glad to see things are looking up Kanashii! How did the mediation go?

Glad to see things are looking up Kanashii! How did the mediation go?

It went fairly well. My ex has to pay me for my half of the house/property and is doing that in slow increments over the next few years. I'm still waiting for everything to be finalized and am debating whether to go back to the maiden name or keep the married one for a few years. It would be a lot of work to change it and I have enough on my plate right now. The ex is trying to change up custody again because what we have now is about to become permanent. He did this last time our previous temporary custody almost became permanent, and it was a lot of hassle/changing of paperwork with very little change in the amount of time WXH saw our child. It's been very frustrating.

On a happier note, my son's testing was completed at school and we have an IEP in place! It should be good for a year and will still be in effect when he rises to first grade. The teachers and I are hopeful that he'll flourish with it.