SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

It's me again in a stupid moment of weakness. He stopped by today to pick up some clothes for work. I kept to myself as usual. Just looking at him hurts. Before he left he came to me and said "you know you can call me if you need anything with the house or help with anything right?". Yall I couldnt contain myself. The pain that ive keeping a lid on pretty successfully around him came to a violent boil inside me and my first thought was HOW DARE HE. How dare he act like some loving concerned man! How dare he play the fake good guy while he is out having sex with a literal demon while I spiral and fight every hour to hold things together for my kids. I bit my cheek hard to keep myself from screaming like a crazy person. I bit out as calmly as I could holding back as much emotion as I could as I responded slowly with "i have friends and people who love me who can help me if I need them." Really hoping it would end there. Instead he says "do you really think thats a better option?". I swear when I say I wanted to unleash everything ive been holding deep down inside at this stupid the nerve of him comment. It quickly became a hushed argument of my clear feelings I cannot depend on a man who walks away from his family for a POS and him trying to tell me he is hurting too. The hell he is. I told him if that was true he would get the help he needed and come back home to his family. Then I did something I truly knew better than to do because I already know the answer. I turned to him and said look me in the eye, do you love her. And he said "im not even in contact with her." Lies. All lies. He does nothing but lie i swear. When he arrived he sat in his car for a good bit of time which he normally does when he in talking to someone and id bet everything there is nothing is on the call log for that period of time because he calls her on Instagram. After he said that I rolled my eyes and walked away. He and I both know the truth. As I said before, I will NEVER understand how that low level no morals serial homewrecking, cheating drug and alcohol abusing mentally deranged violent turd is worth losing everything for. Two cat shits, one litter box.

Maybe I'm misreading this, but I don't see this as a moment of weakness on your part. I think you did a fantastic job of refraining from pulling his nutsack up over his forehead and smothering him with it.

There really isn't a "right" way to handle a situation like this. If I may say, your feelings are entirely valid and don't know if I'd have done any better. I'm so sorry you're having to deal with this. It's awful, and I concurr with your litter box analogy.

My husband walked away from our marriage in 1978. We had a toddler then.

At one point he said I could call him if I needed anything. I told him I needed nothing from him, and would not ever ask him. I told him "the only person I can trust is myself". And that I would not ever make the mistake of depending on anyone again.

I was only 22. I changed in the months he was gone. I found my voice, my self-reliance, and the knowledge that despite everything else I could make it on my own.

He came back a few months later. Looking back, I should have told him to stay away unless and until I would be the only woman in his life. If only I had known what was to come.