Copingmybest (original poster member #78962) posted at 8:07 AM on Thursday, July 11th, 2024
I have fought accepting the things I've know were to be true for so long. She isn't who I thought she was, she doesn't possess the moral values and integrity anywhere near what I believe in, she is set in her ways and doesn't want to work on change. She is still selfish and puts her needs first above mine. I sometimes catch glimpses of potential change or the desire to become less of the things I describe, but I've put way too much hope into those glimpses. Yup, acceptance is a tough pill to swallow. I'm not really looking for anything particular in this post, just exhaling the toxins out of my soul I guess.
NoThanksForTheMemories ( member #83278) posted at 5:55 PM on Thursday, July 11th, 2024
I hear you and feel you, Coping. Acceptance is a long, hard road.
From a neuroscience perspective, I'd say that it takes a while for our brains and thought patterns to change. We took years to build a mental model of our WS/WP. It will take years more of reinforcement with new information to change those models, and change is never easy.
WH had a 3 yr EA+PA. Dday1 Nov '22. Dday4 Sep '23. 30 years together. Staying for the teenager. Allowing space for R without commitment.
