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Newest Member: Jskw458

Divorce/Separation :
Thank you to people giving advice after years on this forum.

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 brokeninhalf4034 (original poster member #42977) posted at 10:20 PM on Sunday, October 30th, 2022

I haven’t thought about this website lately at all. I haven’t remembered DDay in over 5 years LOL (a date I KNEW at the time I would). Oh and we are still together and strong. I can’t believe it’s "us" sometimes and not just "me". I doubted that many times in the first 5 years. I won’t say he’s my soulmate. But I will say with confidence he is now my true life partner and I know I’m his. To death do us part.

I just wanted to share a simple post I just made on Reddit for a man going through this with is wife.

Post- Just jumping on this comment. Not everyone has the same story, but a group/community does help. This website (no I don’t have any ties to it) saved me. . There are many others, all in the same subject. Reddit is WAY to general for this type of situation. You need real people having the same experience with you and then real people helping you rebuild. People that understand what you are going through.
I could not have survived without that site. You of course don’t have to use them. But I do recommend finding a site like them that you feel comfortable with. A place for both male and female voices to be hard. You need to be with people going through what you are. These sites have new (you, just found out 1-3 months), old (in the middle of situation 3-12 months out) and experienced people (1 years to 20!) on them. That is what helped the most. sometimes the anger is to much. Listening to the folks that experienced this and now have survived and are succeeding years later really matters.
I wish you nothing but the best of luck. Either way, if you find each other again or choose to separate. These communities of folks make it so much easier. They help with both processes. And it’s available 24/7. Unlike your one hour every two weeks therapist season that costs $$$. Sometimes we need advice and a community at 3am. This is that!
Best of luck to you and your kids. This is going to suck for A LONG time. But the end of tunnel is so worth it, you to will get through this.

This basically is a very simple thank you to all you folks that have made it through this and continue to support this site. Your thoughts and advice matter. For folks that end up together or separate, this community continues to support people. Thank you for what you do. It matters and many (myself included definitely) can’t thank you enough. Thank you again for helping me achieve the life I deserve.

Me-BS 40
WS-38 LTA with co-worker
Together 10+ - Married almost 1 year (DDay is week before anniv)

"The desire to love someone always exceeds the desire to be loved by someone & that's exactly why we end up loving the person who doesn&

posts: 90   ·   registered: Apr. 2nd, 2014   ·   location: Brooklyn, NY
id 8762913

The1stWife ( Guide #58832) posted at 11:03 PM on Sunday, October 30th, 2022

Glad to know our support is working - and that you are happy.

Survived two affairs and brink of Divorce. Happily reconciled. 10 years out from Dday. Reconciliation takes two committed people to be successful.

posts: 13947   ·   registered: May. 19th, 2017
id 8762920

sisoon ( Moderator #31240) posted at 6:09 PM on Monday, October 31st, 2022

Duplicate. Please respond to thread in General forum.

fBH (me) - on d-day: 66, Married 43, together 45, same sex ap
DDay - 12/22/2010
Recover'd and R'ed
You don't have to like your boundaries. You just have to set and enforce them.

posts: 29994   ·   registered: Feb. 18th, 2011   ·   location: Illinois
id 8762998
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