TheRedQueen ( new member #57851) posted at 1:24 PM on Saturday, January 1st, 2022
Because I love him. And if I had a do over knowing what I know now and the many repeats/relapses - no - I wouldn’t "stay" (it was actually beg him to stay and work on us). Yet I’m still here trying to make it work and I do still love him.
"Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass. It's about learning how to dance in the rain."
Me - BW (40) Him - WH (42)2 Teenagers, 1 Younger Child
D-Day Feb 2016 + .. Most recent D-Day Nov 2021
Still married, not feeling it.....
lordhasaplan? ( member #30079) posted at 8:13 PM on Tuesday, January 4th, 2022
It was a) making sure she was no longer in the affair. About a year. b) Working on myself to heal, about three years C) deciding what I wanted in my marriage and clearly communicating it. Then never accepting less. When I feel the less, it's immediately addressed. This marriage is at least what I want and deserve; if not, I am out. Even after 12 years post-d-day. To this day, she responds with remorse and compassion and is proactive in creating a better marriage.
BS- Me (45)
D-day: 5/18/10, lies and TT till (11/26/10).
Currently in R.
Don't carry others crap. It's your job to fix yourself, not your spouse.