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It's all so new

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The1stWife posted 3/29/2021 07:58 AM

Very positive outcome to your trigger and harsh words.

He appears to understand. Huge step!!!

Glad things are positive for you.

ggcamp1975 posted 3/29/2021 08:27 AM

This is an excellent quick-witted reply to his minimization.

Honestly I impressed myself with that one, I was like damn where was that the other hundreds of times he said she didn't matter. Either way I am pleased with how this went, because truth is not even 30 days ago this would have been a full blown let me see how much I can hurt WH argument and I am working really hard to stop that. He has been so good and letting me go off but it's not fair to him for me to keep poking him, like sometimes I would say stuff just knowing it cut him like a knife. I realize this did not help anyone which is why I am making the effort to stop, hope that makes sense :)

ggcamp1975 posted 4/20/2021 08:37 AM

A little update on me, for those that donít know my WH was caught Oct 2020 sexting with another woman, one he met online. Anyway, I had about 8 questions that I have wanted answers to since then but could never just ask them, I donít know why but I wanted the answers but I was scared of the answer? Anyway, I have been trying this new thing that when something just gets stuck in my mind I am writing it out on Notes (Iphone) and I then transfer it to WH phone for him to read when he feels like it, no pressure and honestly some of them Iíd rather him read alone because I have gotten quite raw in some of them. Saturday I put a note on his phone with those 8 questions, I never said a word (thatís how I have been doing it) and apparently he read it last night. This morning I woke up to 2 pages of answers to those questions, followed by a text ďAnything you want to know, ask me please donít ever feel like you canít. I am here for you and for us. I love you and have a great dayĒ I will say the answers that my mind made up were way worse than the actual answers. The funny thing is most of them I knew the answers to but I guess I needed him to answer them. I know for some this is not a big deal but for me this is huge, I know I have been holding us back a little in recovery by not just coming out and asking or saying what I want. The irony in all of this, if you asked anyone that knows me they will tell you I am the most direct person they have ever met but when it comes to WH something happens to me and I have/had a hard time getting things out. So today I shall celebrate my minor breakthrough/victory! One step at a time, I can do this!

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