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I did it

Notaprettyfeelin posted 8/16/2019 18:09 PM

Hello peeps,

Recently I wrote about this site and how it helped me.
From time to time I log in, sometimes I go to ďjust found out topicĒ sometimes I just read, and wish I could take some of the pain away, but I canít. Itís excruciating but the only way out of it is through it. But today, I write about a come back. I wish some of the people that helped me so much 2 years ago were here( maybe they are) just so I could thank them, but itís been 2 years, and I feel good.
I left him. I thought we had the perfect marriage, didnít argue much, travelled. He was romantic, family oriented, hardworking, handsome, to name a few. We had this beautiful wedding after living together for almost 6 years. People would look at us and say that we were their relationship goals. So ironic because he cheated the whole time we were together, and married. I tried therapy but I kept finding out bits and pieces, and he never ever told me the truth, only confessed things crying while was investigating and coming up with new evidence.
Ironically My Christian family judged me for leaving him, they would say that he was a different man, that I was suppose to fight for my family. In reality he told me these exact words as he was living the house with his suitcase.. ďI had everything I could possibly wanted. I donít know why I do thisĒ. Notice that he said ďdoĒ not ďdidĒ.
Basically Iím here because itís been hard, but Iíve been doing well. Iíve learned how to be on my own. Iíve learned to enjoy whatever it is by myself, I found my self, and recently I met a very nice man and with a lot of resistance from my part, Iím giving my heart a second chance of caring for someone else, but mostly I leaned not to care about what family and friend thinks of this whole stay or go dilema. I chose to let go of him. I chose to forgive but not forget, and to care about me first. Itís ok to be selfish after infidelity. Itís ok to heal slowly, itís ok to cry and itís ok to have trust issues.
I think this is one of the hardest thing we have to go through in life, but we are not immune, or can happen to anyone.
I wish I knew how to write better, and my English as a second language makes matter worst, but the message I want to leave today, is that we can survive this. Keep your head up and trust the beauty of healing!!

Marz posted 8/16/2019 19:57 PM

Ironically My Christian family judged me for leaving him, they would say that he was a different man, that I was suppose to fight for my family.

I've seen this religious facade many times. It's easy to put on a front in public, etc but the truth shows through when you have to live with it every day.

You know. That's all that counts. I wouldn't worry about what the hypocrites think.

traicionada posted 8/17/2019 11:27 AM

Yay! You did it! We are so proud of you!
I was the first person in my traditional Roman Catholic family not only to get divorced but filed for an annulment so I totally get what you are coming from. It wasnít easy but it was worth it.
The truly ironic part of my situation is that it was my parish priest who counseled me through the separation He always ended our sessions with ďearthly fathers would walk through fire to protect their children. Donít ever doubt that our Heavenly Father wants you be safe and happy. Trust himĒ

BearlyBreathing posted 8/17/2019 12:34 PM

Wonderful update! I love reading these as I move forward in my new beginning. Congratulations on the healing, on making yourself your priority, and so happy to hear that you are opening your heart again.

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