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General :
What's fair when it comes to restrictions after an affair / affairs

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Hannah47 ( new member #80116) posted at 5:43 AM on Friday, September 23rd, 2022

I was curious how stuff like this played out in other relationships

If I'm not comfortable with something, he won’t do it unless he can make me feel comfortable. I believe we can have a rational conversation in such situations, and we know this is not about controlling – it’s about making me feel safe (or rather, it's about preventing me from feeling unsafe). There are things that I will never be comfortable with. In those cases, we can talk about it, but in the end it’s my way or the highway.

EDIT to add: the fairness of this lies in the fact that he has the right to have his boundaries - if he's not comfortable with something, I won't do it unless I can make him feel comfortable.

[This message edited by Hannah47 at 5:58 AM, Friday, September 23rd]

posts: 48   ·   registered: Mar. 21st, 2022
id 8756630
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HarryD ( member #72423) posted at 2:06 PM on Sunday, September 25th, 2022

mafayu Some people just love affairs. There is such a rush from them. There is nothing you did to cause this. This is the way your WW is wired.
She loves affair and loves that she can play married , soccer mom, having a good husband to fall back on. It’s easy for married people to have affair because they both know it’s not going to lead to a long term affair
They want the to dump that one to start a new one. The new affair is the Golding ring.
She would be happy to stay married, and continue to have AP best of both worlds. Guest you can’t live with yourself this way. Most can’t

posts: 109   ·   registered: Dec. 30th, 2019   ·   location: NY
id 8756981
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