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My 1st XW - perhaps a 2x4 is in order maybe.

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Charity411 posted 9/21/2020 12:02 PM

MN, I have a kind of rule of thumb about this subject that always keeps me out of trouble. I realized this when I learned my best friend was talking to her ex-boyfriend every day. He was now married to someone else, but he called her every single morning as soon as he left the house.

She took me to breakfast one day to talk to me about how ridiculous his wife was. She had discovered that he was contacting her everyday, sometimes more, and she made him call my friend in front of her and tell her that he was never going to contact her again. My friend went on and on about how immature she was and and insecure she was to make him do that. They were just friends after all.

I asked her if she ever talks to his wife. No. Does wife ever answer the phone when she calls his house and does she say "Hi ____ Is ____ home? No, because she only calls his cell phone. I asked if when she sends him Christmas gifts and cards does are they addressed to both. No. I told her there was nothing ridiculous or insecure about his wife. They were having an emotional affair. She had simply justified it.

I've been single a long time and almost all my friends are married. I don't talk to their husbands alone, or call them. I send cards to Mr. & Mrs. I wouldn't dream of reaching out to the husbands on social media. And because of that, I keep them as friends.

Striver posted 9/21/2020 12:42 PM

I consider contact between married people and former lovers inappropriate.

My ex left me for someone whom she knew before I ever met. I will likely never marry again because of this issue. Some past guy is always going to think he's got "dibs" because he was there first. That's reality. Not fighting that crap anymore. I and my three kids are family. The rest is just for fun.

Buster123 posted 9/21/2020 13:11 PM

MN I thought you were happy in your current relationship, right ? if not what's happened that you're even entairtaining this "blast from the past" ?

Minnesota posted 9/25/2020 22:36 PM

Holy buckets-

Thanks everyone. Continued verification I have assessed this correctly.

Buster- I'm not in a relationship. Haven't been since the D.

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