SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

DevastatedMother,

Can you clear up a few questions which would be very helpful.

First of all, my understanding is downloading the leaked data takes hours as it is gigabites of files. There are professional companies that are doing it and creating serach engines wehre you can check a specific email address to see if it was amember.

How did you friend access the entire data dump??

You need access to the Dark Web to do that.

Im just curious where she works that she is able to download and access that.

Secondly, was she able to obtain his password from the data dump, and then she logged onto AM herself and printed out his pages and pages of activity? B/c my understanding is the dump doesn't contain everyones private messages and activity - just user name, email, password, and height/weight, tagline basically.

I guess Im just curious mostly how your friend accessed the dark web and downloaded gigabytes of data while at work. Any idea?

Agree wholeheartedly with other posters to do some digging on his phone and laptop, personal email, etc before you confront him. He is going to lie his cheating pants off.

Aslo one other question, is what made your friend search for your husband? Did she just randomly decide, Oh I'll search for my friends husband?? Esp when you had no clue or inkling he would eve cheat.

Im sorry but something smells rotten to me. Are you sure your friend didn't have an affair with your husband, then find out he was on AM, got his account info some other way, and is doing this to be vindictive??

I am also hearing the database has to "encrypted"...how did she do this at her job?? Is she an IT genious?

she could be like me - I already have it exported into a local MySQL database and running crystal reports reports against it.

There are so many fake female names it's not even funny.

And in terms of the database being encrypted, it is GPG encrypted. It's an industry-standard encryption technique that is east to disassemble one you have the correct key (which for me was listed next to the torrent)

Eric I assume you are in IT either professionally or as a hobbyist. So I guess if the OPs' friend was an IT specialists I could see it but still seems odd to do all that at your job.

Also again, why would her friend be checking up on spouses of friends?

Eric have you been able to access users' passwords such that you could then log into their accounts as the OP friend did apparently, and obtain all his private message and stuff? Is that even legal?

I've already searched for most of my usual suspects who should be in there, and I've searched for anyone on my shit list too!

You can't get the passwords. They're hashed.

So how did the OP friend get "172 pages" detailing who he met up with and when

??

Just trying to put the pieces together as it isn't adding up to me

Thanks for the questions. I am much better now and my friend is helping. Here she is, I'll let her explain.

Hello I am the friend of Devastated Mother. She asked me not to use her real name, and neither will I, but wanted to let you know how I came across the information.

The data dump was actually done last evening (central time) when my company's IT director (my direct boss) received a TL notification with regard to potential security violations. We have T3 connections which allows us to download VLF's in relatively short times. In addition, in conjunction with our security office we have to monitor any information that may impact our financial security, so of course with the data dump we were able to obtain the file.

It must be noted that legality of doing so may differ between jurisdictions. In our case, we had no need to obtain permission, although our legal department was duly notified and provided an audit trail for our activities in procuring the data.

I copied the file to my own laptop once we received it for my own use (legally and with my company's permission, I might add). I decided to look up some of my friends' information, mainly to see if any information had been compromised, in addition to our clients. Though I was surprised to see my friend's information, I copied all the information. I called her this morning, then took the afternoon off to be with her after printing the information on her husband.

The information contains both encrypted and unencrypted passwords. Since her husband used a simple "bcrypt" protocol, the password was essentially useless, and much of his activity information (chats, messages) was exposed in the initial dump. Regardless, the information doesn't hide his email address, full address information, social media account information, credit card information, and date/timestamps of all contacts with Ashley Madison.

Note: I did a raw dump of over 170 pages but most of it is blank, about half with a single entry or word on them. There is a lot of information and contacts, but it only would take up about 4 or 5 single spaced typed pages. Much of it is also written in "gibberish English", such as Mxyx xnxaxmxe (My name with x's) and other such gibberish. I just wanted to have the entire record printed.

Since the credit card is in his name, we have a dilemma. We can't notify the company without him knowing, so we will leave it for now until (DM) talks with him.

I did find another friend in it as well. I will have a word with him as his credit card was exposed.

Wow thanks for the update/explanation

Still don't really get what an IT company needs to download the AM data dump for but whatever.

So basically you just got basic data including login/join times, etc. I think the "172" pages is what thru me off -- as if it were pages of chats, messages, etc.

have you two now logged onto his actual account and obtained that?? If not Id do so asap and help her save it someplace safe. Maybe read it for her since it will be so traumatizing.

Did DM have any suspicions her husband was or had ever cheated?

I don't see why people freak out over credit cards. As long as you check your balances regularly you wouldn't be responsible for any fraudulent charges.

As one other question if you would be so kind to answer: How did DM discern WHO the OW was. She indicated in a reply that she even knew who he had met. Did she mean the identity of the person? Did she know this from real life, or discerned it from the data dump?

The information contains both encrypted and unencrypted passwords. Since her husband used a simple "bcrypt" protocol, the password was essentially useless, and much of his activity information (chats, messages) was exposed in the initial dump. Regardless, the information doesn't hide his email address, full address information, social media account information, credit card information, and date/timestamps of all contacts with Ashley Madison.

The husband doesn't use bcrypt - the site does. And the passwords were not bcrypted, the data was. The passwords were further encrypted, to my knowlege

I second not confronting right away. I confronted way too soon (I was in shock and wasn't thinking) and because of that, I'll never know the whole truth. I caught him checking out the AM website years before DDay. He said he was 'just' looking and I believed him. Or I was too busy dealing with ppd and two babies to want to register what was happening. In reality, there was so much more than curiosity on his part. And as confused said, even 'just looking' is cheating.

I know it'll be difficult. I'm sure he's feeling stressed out about the leak and is on high alert himself.

So sorry you find yourself here. :(

Hello everyone,

I also would like to chime in here. I'm a perpetual lurker from 2010. I am currently downloading the file. I wouldn't worry too much about people questioning whether or not one has to be an IT genius or hobbyist for that matter. I'm certainly no expert, but I happen to think most SI'ers have become pretty handy with computers when trying to dig up evidence. Simply searching a torrent website and having a program to download torrents (Free file sharing) is really all that is necessary. Does anyone remember the program Napster? There are tons just like it. It is considered illegal to file share copyrighted material, however, since the downloaders aren't responsible for the hacking, it is a matter of public information and finding it. I'm about 23% of the way through and there are thousands of people downloading it along with me. I'm making sure my husband isn't on the site, as well as family members. If anyone decides to do it, enable private browsing and research programs to make sure they are safe. I would offer up my sources but I'm not sure about admin's policies on it, or whether or not it would go in Investigative tips.

Edit for spelling

[This message edited by Will-I-Ever-Know at 6:26 PM, August 19th (Wednesday)]

Devastated, I'm so sorry.

Personally, I think you have enough info to do something now. Frankly, you have time for some shock and awe. Since your children are secure, I would leave a page of the AM info in your house, with your wedding ring, and a note. The note would say something like, "This tells you everything you need to know. Your children are secure with grandparents. I am gone until I decide to allow you to speak to me. That may be never."

Block his calls.

And go away for a few days. Don't speak to him at all. Go totally dark.

Maybe, with shock and awe, you might get some traction and recovery out of him. You might also get a little time to clear your mind. A dday is a brutal thing and it will take a LOT out of you.

I am sorry you have joined our little club. We'll get you through.

*fist bump* to your friend. That could not have been easy for her to tell you but it was the right thing to do.

The entire data dump is on the dark web. I saw some people I suspected. I will warn all who dare to venture to the dark web that there are things you just can't un see. Also beware of pop ups and trojans.

Do not download the torrent it may be illegal and it would be a federal crime.

There are sites that have posted it. You can just sift through it if you really want to do that.

Honestly I think it will eventually make it to the regular (bright) web. Wait for that if you really are curious.

Sorry for the TJ.

There are already sites that will let you search by email address.

Please seriously consider Rebreather's advice. It will give you a feeling of taking back a bit of control (and you'll respect yourself a lot for it later); it will give you time to collect yourself; and should you ever later desire it, will result in the best shot at getting a "remorseful" spouse later.

go dark for a few days and let him sweat instead of you.

I'm at my friend's house now. I confronted my husband when he came home. I wasn't screaming but I was angry, though I did cry a couple of times.

My husband and I will talk about it Friday but for now I don't want to talk to him.

Thank you SO much everyone for helping me. I'm sure there are hundreds, maybe thousands of women going through what I am doing today. I don't know what the future will hold but I do know that the only thing that matters to me is my children.

I'll come back later and personally thank those that posted here but now I need to look forward. Thanks again.

T/J to say: 10yearsafter & emptiness2014- You're right. I found the email checker. Much quicker than waiting another hour. Not interested in sifting through 10GB and possible being prosecuted for it.

Sad to know that there will be so many new members because of this, but glad that the hackers posted it. Everyone deserves to know if they've been betrayed. End T/J.

Devastatedmother: I'm glad that you're staying with a friend, take care of yourself and your kiddos!

DM

More power to you and your friend is great.

And just so you know there are plenty of women and men crying over the AM data theft.

The ratio of men to women clients on their site were nearly even in most countries.'

Good luck and keep us posted.

HM