SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

Apparently this was from a 2006 interview ... but my H didn't have an A then so I never heard before now...

Tom Hanks has opened up about cheating on his first wife, admitting having an affair while he was married was "nothing to celebrate." The star married Samantha Lewes in 1978 but began an affair with future wife Rita Wilson while they were filming Volunteers.

In the June issue of Esquire magazine, the notoriously private star candidly recalls his cheating, saying, "Rita and I just looked at each other and - kaboing - that was that. I asked Rita if it was the real thing for her, and it just couldn't be denied."

Commenting on the affair, he adds, "Well, yeah, I did happen to be married at the time. And there's nothing to celebrate about that."

Hanks and Wilson wed in 1988 and have two children together, Chester, 15 and Truman, 10.

That makes me sad and a little sick to my stomach. I'll never look at him the same again.

What I hate most about it is that it validates OW's ideas that an A will turn into something permanent. MOW is still lurking 11 months after FWH ended it and stories like this give them hope. I can't wait for Brangelina to end.

That kills me when I see that the OP and WS are still together and live a fairytale future.

That sucks!!!

Pretty funny, with his squeaky-clean image and how America loves him.... he's everybody's favorite guy.

For years these people have been portrayed as the perfect couple. I've listened to descriptions of how she's just this great Midwestern girl, really down to earth.

Nope. She's an OW. They are cheaters. Their children are the children of cheaters.

"Is it the real thing?" Give me a break. What would any OW say to Tom Hanks when asked that question? "No Tom, not the real thing, we'll have to stop cheating now. I don't really want to marry a big star".

Somewhere out there is his BW, the victim in all this.

This just shows how tolerant America is of cheating. America doesn't really think this is a problem. It doesn't matter if you're living with or married to someone; if someone more attractive comes along and takes an interest in you (maybe because you're a movie star for instance), it's just FINE to dump your spouse summarily.............

I'll never look at him the same... I always loved him as an actor too.

We would like to think that "everyone makes a mistake"....etc, etc...

But we also know here at SI that cheating just can't be passed off as an oops "mistake"

Cheating is a choice...

Apparently Tom Hanks made that choice too.

From what I've seen, it wouldn't surprise me to discover half the marriages began as EA's or PA's. People have a tendency to start the next relationship before ending the current one. It's not admirable and is more common place than any of us can fathom.

Hanks and Wilson affair was 25 years ago. They've been married 20 years, in an environment where infidelity is more common than botox. I doubt their marriage has been a fairy tale, especially considering the origin of their relationship. I have yet to meet anyone with a fairy tale life or marriage and if they think they have one, they're just a few steps from discovering an affair.

From what I've heard over the years, Hanks and Wilson have one of the stronger marriages in the entertainment industry. To me, that says they've learned something. I find that more noteworthy than they began as an affair.

If I'm going to judge them on anything, it would be on what they've learned from their past. Life is learning and growing from the mistakes, bad choices and the pain we've caused others and ourselves.

My knowledge of Tom Hanks is limited to interviews I've seen on tv, but I doubt he's the same man he was in his late twenties when he cheated in his first marriage. Judging the person he is today on the person he was in 1984 seems ridiculous to me, especially when his only impact in our lives is what we see on a movie or tv screen.

Of course, both Hanks and Wilson may have had dozens of affairs over the past 20 years. If that's the case, I feel more sorrow for them than anything else - they're looking for something they're only going to find in themselves.

I don't usually get into the movie star infidelity cases, but googled his first wife and found this: http://www.nypost.com/seven/09122006/gossip/pagesix/pagesix.htm

I think it's interesting to hear what they were stating at the time, sounds pretty familiar to me (also noticed the article didn't really mention that he was cheating, just that he married Rita Wilson a year later...hmmm... )

"My husband has repeatedly verbally abused and humiliated me during the past 90 days in my home. This caused me to suffer great emotional distress," Dillingham wrote an L.A. court in asking for a restraining order against Hanks.

Hanks shot back in his own legal filing, alleging that Dillingham was delaying a divorce trial "merely to harass me and try to squeeze an unfair settlement out of me."

Sounds a lot like blameshifting... of course I ONLY make this assessment with the disclaimer that it's completely only based on such a small part of the story it's stupid. They are entertainers, and I'm just looking at the story presented by third parties AS entertainment.

It said the divorce took 3 years, and they used the words "dragged on for" which is funny sorta. Three years sounds pretty normal to some folks here, I guess it all depends on who you ask :P

sm

[This message edited by smallmouse at 10:08 AM, May 17th (Sunday)]

He had a son with his first wife too. So she really did break up not only a marriage but a family.

More movies NOT to watch.

This is such depressing news. First Paul Newman, then Mel Gibson and now this fool, too.

WHEN YOU MARRY A MAN WHO CHEATS ON HIS WIFE, YOU MARRY A MAN WHO CHEATS ON HIS WIFE.

Damn.. this has ruined Forrest Gump for me!

Bleh

That's sad.

God doesn't bring you your soulmate while you are married...

It's a little surpising that they have lasted so long considering how it started!