Be wary of small minded people with a little authority

At what point is enough, enough?

I'm 28 days out from discovery of my wife's infidelity with a married individual, both with similar credentials, (professors). Said infidelity took place over 6 months that I know of. In and out of hotels locally, meeting at conferences. All the while texting each other EXTREMELY graphic indulgences and fantasies while I'm working and/or tending to our 7 year old. 90% of which I have now seen, and not because she offered, obviously not a help.

She claims to want to move on and restore our relationship but in actuality I really think her decision revolves almost entirely around money. She has accumulated quite a fortune in our 8.5 years of marriage and I really think it boils down to how much she stands to lose.

Fail I to mention this indiscretion was also going on during our trip to Paris in July, they were there for the same conference and while I was again watching the kid they were living it up. I bought her a custom neckless from a family jeweler and gave it to her for her birthday. I have taken it back since, because to me, she killed any good memories of that trip.

I don't think I can ever trust her again given the absolutely egregious level of this violation of my trust. She has apparently moved on already, yet I am extremely sensitive to ANY deviation in her location and statements. I am a ball of nerves all the time and always, always suspicious of her movements and "explanations".

I guess I'm just wondering if anyone else has actually made it through this level of deceit and regained a solid marriage. I really feel like it's time for me to move on, I can't keep living my life and continually tracking her and scrutinizing her movements.

14 comments posted: Monday, November 25th, 2024