In the past is death, in the future is life

New life

Hey guys,
Don't post to much, do read though. Sorry, I did get banned from a couple areas at the beginning for violating a rule.
So the title kinda says it all. I'm really looking for advice to ensure I don't mess up here. Recently the wife and I have completely changed our lives. We've been married 39 years now. April of this year, found out I have cancer, a rare form of lymphoma. So after doing initial treatments and several consultations with my drs, I decided after extensive discussions with the wife that I would do an early retirement at my then job (18 yrs), sell the house and move to where our 21 yr old daughter is living and engaged to be married. Be able to be near her and we can make some really good memories together to pass on. Drs recommended that I change work due to taxing my immune system as well.
Now We've up and moved across country and I've started a new job, just for a couple years till retirements kick in.
The wife has no friends here same as I. So I'm getting to know some of the people I work with. Normally I don't mix business and pleasure so to speak, guess a left over protective thing from a military career. I have a work partner that we do a similar job within a work group, that has been teaching me the ropes here on the job. The partner is a woman.
So I see a chance for my wife to possibly make a friend, as the lady and her husband aren't much younger than us. She has even said she'd like to meet my wife.
Now the odd part. Im fairly private and standoffish, my work partner has said we should grab breakfast after work sometime to yak about things and get to know each other good. Well this is where the bell went off in my head. Talked to my wife about this and she, like me, doesn't feel comfortable with that. I did tell my work partner that I'd enjoy hanging for breakfast, but only if our spouses joined us, as I felt it was inappropriate otherwise, as we both are married.
I just want to ensure that as I go forward with a new life, that I maintain good life boundries.
My wife and I are very monogamous and have no desire to an open marriage or swinging. We are fine with how our marriage is. We both just want to make new friendships here. My work partner said she doesn't care either way. She doesn't tell her hubs what he can or can't do. He's a SAHD.
Should I just not get to know any of my work partners off the job and meet others in other ways? I just feel uncomfortable being in mixed company in that way, even if it is innocent.

8 comments posted: Tuesday, December 5th, 2023