A Letter to AP
I don’t know if I’ll ever send this, but I want to post it for some kind of catharsis. I apologize for the body shaming in advance. I’m one angry BW.
Oh W, How does it feel to be low hanging fruit? Did you think you were going to get to date him again? I’m sure you just loooved the attention he gave you. Especially because you fell in love with him while you guys dated but he couldn’t stand you. You probably finally felt wanted again. After all, he was fighting with his girlfriend, and you’re still single. I’m sure you looked at our pictures on Facebook and felt that twinge of jealousy. "They probably don’t have long, you thought. This is my chance. And he must be really hung up on me to keep reaching out!" But you weren’t wanted. You were his razor blade to cut himself with. He hated the way you texted. How dumb you were. How you sent idiotic gifs. He hated your thick glasses and how much makeup you wore. He was disgusted by your stretch marks and saggy boobs. He hated the sound of your voice.
We’re engaged now. He planned an incredible proposal. He thought of everything. We live together. He’s going to be an incredible bonus dad for my kids. He works his butt off to make sure we have a great life. He fixes up our house. I love him deeply, flaws and all. Go ahead and call me stupid. We’re planning a wedding that is going to be so much fun. We are going to have a marriage that is eternal and lasting. And I’m forgiving him. He deserves it. He knows what a mistake you were…
He reached out to you when he was depressed and wanted to feel like shit about himself. Imagine that! Being such a POS that by giving you attention it made him feel like garbage. Powerful stuff. Maybe he hated you the most for knowing about me and still doing it. Maybe he wanted you to wake up and snap him out of it. But you don’t have that sense of right and wrong. You’re selfish. Lonely. Codependent. Willing to be at some guy’s beck and call. You probably think you deserve a guy like him. Hell, you probably do! One that cheats and lies. One that goes behind your back. Blocks you out of shame. I mean, it’s what you deserve, right? Another guy like your ex who abandons you. Treats you like shit. Insecurity isn’t a good look.
I’m glad I’m not you. I’m glad I have my life together. I’m not dealing with a DUI. I’m a great partner. A great mother. I’ve had two kids and still have a tight body and great ass. A great sense of humor. A sense of morality. I believe in God. I’m always working to be a better person (except now…anger is a helluva drug). I even have an ex who pays his child support and actually wants to see his kids. One who actually shows up to court!
Did you really think that you were going to win against the Big Mean Bitch who sent you a Tiktok that hit too close to home? Ouch. Maybe you’ve learned your lesson this time…
But all in all, I’m sure it’s not easy for you. But being easy sure is!
Enjoy your lonely life - I know I’m the lucky one.
13 comments posted: Tuesday, May 17th, 2022
We Start Therapy on Thursday
Any tips would be appreciated. We really want this to be productive and healthy.
19 comments posted: Tuesday, May 17th, 2022