BS - 55 on dday
WH - 48 on dday
Dday: 9/1/17
Status: Reconciled

And the anger still rages on

My H and I have reconciled, we are 3 yrs out and our marriage is great. He is back to being his loving, caring and sweet self, is remorseful and has apologized to me at least a million times. We have both fixed and worked out our demons and are back to being partners again.

BUT, the hate and the rage I still feel for his AP is still there, and is actually worse than before. The only reason I can come up with is the fact my H apologized and showed me remorse. I forgave him. But she, (and I know she doesn't owe me anything) never felt the consequences of her actions. And this is the part that gets me: maybe she did and I will never know.

I am a firm believer and a member of the "You don't fuck another woman's husband club" and feel she has violated "girl code". She should lose her membership card.

I have a really good friend that works at the same company the AP works at and I have seen some work photos of her all smiling and happy.

Believe me, I know my H was cheating scum bag and he paid dearly for what he did, but she's a cheating scum bag too and what she did hurt me as well. I absolutely hate her with every fiber in my body and so want the karma bus to run over her face. How can I get past these hateful feelings? I know it's not healthy to feel this way.

25 comments posted: Tuesday, October 13th, 2020