The Broken Plate
consider a public post that can be found on the big I
The Broken Plate Analogy
I was considering the broken plate analogy the other day when it occurred to me that it is, in fact, an incomplete thought. If you’re unaware of the analogy of which I speak it goes something like this:
"Grab a plate. Now break it on the floor. Now tell it you’re sorry. Is it fixed? No? Now you understand."
It makes sense. It gets the point across but lacks the punch that the "plate" in any scenario really feels.
In my mind the scenario goes like this:
Grab a plate. Smash it. Tell it your sorry. The plate believes you that you are sorry and forgives you but it is still broken. Now comes the sticky part. You feel bad that the plate is still broken so you try to fix it. Glue, duct tape, anything that will put the pieces back together for the plate. The plate is grateful. You feel good for helping put the plate back together. And you are both happy for a time while the plate is letting the glue dry and from all outward appearances the plate looks fine. But the plate still remembers being dropped and can feel the cracks because they are part of the plate now.
Here’s where it gets really troublesome. More time passes and everything is good between you and the plate. You actually start to forget that you broke the plate and feel like everything is back to normal. Even the plate feels good again. After some regular wear, the cracks are really starting to fade. But the plate still gets nervous sometimes when you go to touch it. It gets that little reminder of how it felt being smashed and is nervous about it happening again. You reassure the plate you would never break it again. You say you are sorry for dropping it in the first place. The plate still believes you. You cherish the plate and don’t want to ever damage it again.
The problem is damage. You can clean and wash the plate and care for it. You can be careful with the plate and make sure you don’t do anything that could break the plate again. But the cracks are still there no matter how much time passes. And when you go to put something heavy on the plate again the stress can make the glue come undone and those cracks never let the plate be as strong as it was originally. The plate wants to be strong again. It wants to carry everything you want to put on it. But the weight of the things you want to put on the plate sometimes cause those old cracks to hurt and feel more prominent.
My advice, never intentionally break a plate.
When you 'break the plate' - whether intentionally (as in willfully) or accidentally (???!!) - life with the 'broken plate' will never be the same as the 'before'
6 comments posted: Tuesday, July 18th, 2023
Males beating their wife/girlfriend
Just read a post where "victum" was put in an induced coma. AFTER several (?) "beatings" that were not as severe.
I just DON'T understand the mindset of WHY a woman will take such abuse. ONE TIME abuse should be enough to put at least 10 kilometers of real-estate between the woman and the scumbag beater. Add a police report, medical exam to validate injury and
RO and also take measures to be prepared to defend your self (the beatee) as necessary to stop further abuse.
FWIW - wife has told me if I EVER hit her - do not count on waking up the next morning.
For the life of me! I do not understand why this situation goes on so often other than there are a lot of SICK people on this planet. (not even going into "custom" in other countries!)
So folks - care go add comments?
38 comments posted: Friday, July 7th, 2023
Happy Ending in UK?
while looking for something (forgot what!) google pulled up
appears UK has no problem with them
then reading some more on other "hits" -
Read that "They are OK if your spouse knows you partake" (ya - both genders can partake)
It is infidelity is you partake WITHOUT your spouse knowing.
Aside - gave me an Idea for a Gift Certificate for someone this Christmas.
Would like to read what other think of this.
And, No, never had had one or paid for a lady of the evening services.
12 comments posted: Monday, December 5th, 2022