Many DDays. Me (BW) 46 Him (WH) 49
Happily detached and compartmentalized.
Vent about my idiot WS
Generally speaking, we've been getting along (AKA successfully rug-sweeping) for a while, since his last stupidity leak in December 2019. (Oh wait, there was another smaller one in mid 2020...)
I've mostly stopped playing cop on him, and I think he's been mostly good. My spidey senses haven't been going off, at least. That's all part of my detaching. Oh yeah, and I have my own mantra now... NAMMMMMM, like OMMMM, but stands for Not Another Moment, meaning when I start spiraling and thinking about what a POS I married, I just think NAMMMMM, Not Another Moment will I waste thinking about him and his lacking. He's been playing a TON of disc golf lately, which I used to play with him before kids and had planned to once the kids got old enough to be left alone all day, but decided fuck it, he has never embraced things I love, so I'll return the non favor and let him do his thing on his own. I prefer the quiet and stress-free solitude around the house anyway. So Saturday, he gets early up for his tournament, we get a little frisky, but not much because he doesn't want to lose his mojo. Whatever. He plays, he and his doubles partner get their butts kicked, he comes home (already a bit buzzed) then we proceed to actually have a really great evening together. Totally flirting around, getting frisky everywhere (even in public). Then as we're both heading back to our bathroom (it was Saturday, we were going to the bubbler!) I playfully said "Hey, you sure you don't want to throw me on this freshly-laundered bed" (I had done a bunch of chores during the day while he was playing) "and fuck me?"
He looked at me and said "You're just too easy. That's not sexy. I need a little bit of the chase."
Considering he had told me not 8 days prior that he "really needed me to jump his bones more" this did not go over well.
WTF?? Seriously, wtf is wrong with him??
His response the next day when, surprise surprise, I was still really pissed about it was that:
a) he was joking (every ahole man's excuse for being a fuckface)
b) he felt "pressured" into having sex (??)
c) was drunk and says stupid shit all the time and I should know not to believe what he says.
d) I misinterpret what he says.
Not sure how these things can all be true at the same time.
Part of my deep anger about this is that I also happen to be an extremely expressive person - I make funny faces, on purpose or accident, ALL THE TIME. One of my previous exes told me I reminded him of Calvin (of Calvin and Hobbes.) My WS has told me on multiple occasions that my funny faces weren't sexy, or I shouldn't make "that" face because it's a turn-off. Well fuckrag, good thing I have more talents than being your 30-second (if I'm lucky) cum-dumpster 4-5 mornings a week!! Being sexy 24/7 isn't my fucking job!
After ruminating on it for a day and a half, I can't help wondering if he full-on panicked because he had fucked someone else that day. We have had sex before other tournaments and he wasn't worried about his mojo (he's really not that good, he has very little DG mojo to risk FFS). What if he had some one else's gunk on his junk and he freaked out thinking I'd smell/taste it on him?
8 comments posted: Monday, April 5th, 2021