Scorpio2310 (original poster member #41561) posted at 11:55 AM on Sunday, August 31st, 2025
When alone with my thought and think about it, I find myself trying to to justify it and coddle myself with the excuse/"justification", "Well, it wasn’t that bad… it was only an emotional affair.
I know that there is no difference in the two, and having emotionally cheated twice, I also have a small idea of just how much I have hurt BS.
I guess what I searching for in this post is how to combat the ego stroking of "at least I didn’t physically cheat on her." I realize that is deflection and a thinking error, but as I said it is just me stroking my ego.
How does one take a good feeling and make it feel so wrong that they no longer desire it?
ff4152 ( member #55404) posted at 3:49 PM on Sunday, August 31st, 2025
Here’s what I recommend. It really turned the tide for me and allowed me to think outside myself.
Look at all of this from your wife’s perspective. Would she view what you did as "no big deal"?
Our problem is we never stopped to consider how our actions impacted others. Sure we lied to ourselves about what their reaction would be upon discovery. But we both know that deep down, it wasn’t true.
