Morris45 posted 3/1/2020 12:45 PM

My wife and I are moving forward after 9 months of my trickle truths and gaslighting.
My lies have made it very difficult (understandably) for her.
Especially after waiting 38 years to tell her.
My question for others who have been here is this.
How many of you have had a ONS while you were separated from your spouse and thought about your spouse during the act?
In my situation my wife and I knew the AP. She was friends with my wife.
Looking back I believe she had issues with my wife. She told me my wife had said things I found afterwards to be lies and should have known it from the beginning.
I’m not trying to make excuses. Being separated gave me no right to cheat on my wife!
Looking forward to your comments.

[This message edited by Morris45 at 12:47 PM, March 1st (Sunday)]

DaddyDom posted 3/1/2020 15:16 PM

Welcome to SI!

How many of you have had a ONS while you were separated from your spouse and thought about your spouse during the act?

This is an interesting question... I'm curious what it is you are trying to discern however? If others did or did not think of their spouses during intimacy with the AP, what meaning does that hold for you? It seems like there is a deeper question here and I'm just not sure what it is?

Morris45 posted 3/2/2020 17:09 PM

Thanks DaddyDom for the reply.
The reason I was asking is my wife was curious as to how common it is to think about your spouse while having a ONS.
In my case I was separated and did not want to be. I was distraught and the explains why.

Morris45 posted 3/2/2020 17:14 PM

Thanks DaddyDom for the reply.
The reason I was asking is my wife was curious as to how common it is to think about your spouse while having a ONS.
In my case I was separated and did not want to be. I was distraught and the explains why.