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Newest Member: keljoack (44931)

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User Topic: Raising boys not to be misogynists
Jrazz
♀ Guide
Member # 31349
Default  Posted: 4:42 PM, July 4th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Posting as a member.

It's threads like this that remind me how fortunate I was to be raised to respect people of all backgrounds.

That doesn't mean I'm not guilty of an errant comment now and again, ("men are dumb" and "bitches are crazy" have both escaped my lips, embarassingly enough)

As a mother, it's is my first priority after DD's safety to make sure that she knows to treat EVERYONE with respect, period. This includes her awareness that she is to be treated with respect as well.

I've been complimented throughout my life on being able to adapt to many social situations, and it always comes down to having an awareness of how critical it is to be considerate of others.

Don't get me wrong, I say and do dumb things all the time, but I cannot for the life of me understand why people would ever say intentionally rude or hurtful things to others for any reason whatsoever. It's just not in me, and I know that this is thanks to my parents'/family's example throughout the years.

Lead by example, grapefruit. Crazz's father is a disrespectful, awful person but his mother was very kind and accepting of all people, and he absorbed her outlook for the most part. There are going to be a lot of influences in your DS's life, but yours carries significant weight and you can help teach him that all things living deserve our respect regardless of ignorant dissenters.


I bow to those who keep their hearts open when it is most difficult, those who refuse to keep their armor on any longer than they have to, those who recognize the courage at the heart of vulnerability. - Jeff Brown

Posts: 17307 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: California
sisoon
♂ Member
Member # 31240
Default  Posted: 4:52 PM, July 4th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Commercials especially are dangerous. Because they're repeated so often, they find their way into our memories - and they make all of their actors look stupid.

Worse, the logic and language in commercials promote stupidity and imprecise language - which promotes imprecise communications, which promotes miscommunication.

Truly, our civilization is on very thin ice (IMO). Europeans killed their civilization about 1500 years ago, but the Chinese never did. If we in the West do it again, I hope we don't take the Chinese down with us....

Rant - The ads at the top of my list right now are:

1) 4 African-American men entranced by some new light beer bottle. (Miller? Bud?)

2) Men and women singing about Miller 64 to a folk tune.

3) Sportscuts(?) - watch sports on TV while getting your hair cut by beautiful women. Um...I think I see a lot of men who wear glasses...that is, when I'm wearing my glasses. I gotta take 'em off when I get a haircut, and then I can barely see the barber, much less the TV. I wonder how many other men who wear glasses can watch TV with their naked eyes.... (And to those who have met me, yes, I need my hair cut regularly. )

End rant

[This message edited by sisoon at 4:54 PM, July 4th (Thursday)]


fBH (me) - 70 (22 in my head), fWW (plainsong) - 65+, Married 45+, together since 1965
DDay - 12/2010
Recovered, not yet fully R'ed
I share my own experience because it's the only experience I know, not because I'm a good model.

Posts: 10069 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: Chicago area
aesir
♂ Member
Member # 17210
Default  Posted: 5:20 PM, July 4th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Worse, the logic and language in commercials promote stupidity and imprecise language - which promotes imprecise communications, which promotes miscommunication.
Ugh, don't even get me started on the innumeracy of commercials that has now made it's way onto even the news. When I am cranky I like to take advertisements with me to the store and try to make them live up to a mathematically correct version of what they are offering. It never happens, but occasionally I will have the satisfaction of encountering someone who is aware that mathematical concepts often have very specific answers. Thanks to a friend and I, Perkins in Canada pulled the little dessert folders from their stores because it said the Fudge Flattop had the fillings between two Belgian Waffles, but really it was between a half a Belgian Waffle, they saw our pointing it out as an inconvenience. Same friend went to Minnesota, and pointed it out for fun, the called the manager who apologized profusely and offered to have him one made special that conformed to the ad. My friend admitted to just being a math ass.

what do you have against male gymnasts?!?
Didn't you read the miss part, that implies female, even though we are talking about boys. Clearly it is a problem with transgendered gymnasts.


Your mileage may vary... in accordance with the prophecy.

Do not back up. Severe tire damage.


Posts: 14924 | Registered: Nov 2007 | From: Winnipeg
metamorphisis
♀ Administrator
Member # 12041
Default  Posted: 5:24 PM, July 4th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

As the mother to both a daughter and a son.. generalizations about gender come at our kids from all angles hard. It's not specific to one gender. As Jrazz was saying it's my job to teach them to be good people. And in doing so, to recognize people who aren't respecting them and treating them well.



“We don't see things as they are; we see them as we are.”... Anais Nin

Posts: 44686 | Registered: Sep 2006
authenticnow
♀ Moderator
Member # 16024
Default  Posted: 7:26 PM, July 4th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Now is there any situation in which a guy could get away with the equivalent of this?
Yes, pretty much all over the world.

Read the book Half the Sky by Nicholas Kristof to see how rampant misogyny is all around the world.


Take up your space (and do it well).

"That's the thing about pain, it demands to be felt."


Posts: 37574 | Registered: Sep 2007
Topic Posts: 25
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