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No deposit

Shehawk posted 5/7/2021 11:08 AM

So this month I have not yet received funds and there has not been payment for the mortgage.

Special thanks to attorney number one who apparently submitted a temporary order over a year ago that did not (how this could happen I have no idea) include who pays the mortgage and several other bills.

Not sure I can say this here so mods I will delete if you ask but praying for a miracle.

Did talk with the lender and they have no covid programs and no way to modify without husband's participation.

Catwoman posted 5/7/2021 11:39 AM

File for an emergency order.


Shehawk posted 5/7/2021 12:02 PM

Thanks for the suggestion!

I will see if the court has this form.

Shehawk posted 5/8/2021 20:06 PM

And to be clear, my wh did not deposit has half of the mortgage in the joint account this month. I suspect that this was strategic on his part.

THis decision to not divide even one single piece of our marital property or stuff has consumed another series of retainers to the point where I am not in a financial position to be able to continue to pay more retainer funds. So I will be representing myself...or withdrawing the action.

Shehawk posted 5/10/2021 18:26 PM

I see a pending deposit. It is less than it should be which has been the consistent case but it is there!!!
Thanks to everyone for your support. I will make it one more month. Will update more later.

Shehawk posted 5/10/2021 18:28 PM

I see a pending deposit. It is less than it should be which has been the consistent case but it is there!!!
Thanks to everyone for your support. I will make it one more month. Will update more later.

Shehawk posted 5/28/2021 20:39 PM

Thank God literally the lights are still on and the mortgage is paid another month. And there is food in the fridge.

No thanks to wh. I emailed him today asking him to comply with a certain term of the judge's current order. The order tells me to get this from him. I get a flat no and an accusation that I am doing something abnormal. Nope. Normal people who are still married and want to get a divorce do things to move it forward.

Its why I no longer have a lawyer. Because this sort of stonewalling burnt up all the $$$ I had for legal bills.

Shehawk posted 5/28/2021 20:41 PM

And Cat. I found a process server where he is living and am working on figuring what I can file. Think it's a modification. Will try to find a self help legal group. Heard there is one here.

Shehawk posted 6/13/2021 00:46 AM

Same thing different month. I ask myself why. How could I ever have lives with someone who acts like this?

It's like this with every other bill as well.

I found on linked in where he is working as a sales rep while claiming no income other than disability.

WhoTheBleep posted 6/13/2021 04:41 AM

I ask myself why. How could I ever have lives with someone who acts like this?

I can so relate to this.

I'm so sorry you are dealing with this. Stbx and I own some property together. I found out he let it go to collections. (Mind you, his income is two and a half times what mine is) I had to pay everything myself. My lawyer assures me I will get it back in the divorce... But I'm not so sure. There's so much of a financial mess.

Document and keep receipts for everything. Judges tend to not like men (and women) who don't support their families. Deadbeats.

Anna123 posted 6/13/2021 09:10 AM

If you can contact your local women's shelter, they will direct you to a pro bono legal help team member. You need to do this yesterday.

They will help you modify the terms of your order. Can you ask if they have someone who can handle communications with cheater?

I emailed him today asking him to comply with a certain term of the judge's current order.

It is NEVER good for the BS to contact cheater on these matters. Ever. Once this is legally modified, it will be between him and the legal system, not him and you. I am not sure what a lawyer would charge to send a letter when this happens, or if the pro bono connection will for you? Just the notification he is not complying and the deadline to remedy it? This communication can't come from you. It belittles the seriousness of it. Psychologically for him it is different if you go dark and all legal communications are between him and someone else. You tell him if he asks that you are no longer handling legal communications at the request of your legal team, even if it is tied to the pro bono and not full on representing you.

He is not allowed to ignore legal requirements. If he does there are legal consequences. Remember, this is not you vs him. It is the law vs him. No more texting or emailing him on this. Sorry to be so harsh but this cheater messing with BS's financially stuff boils my blood.

Take care. Sorry you are dealing with such an ass.

Anna123 posted 6/13/2021 09:10 AM


[This message edited by Anna123 at 9:11 AM, June 13th (Sunday)]

Shehawk posted 6/23/2021 10:59 AM

That is a great point about the psychological of me versus the legal system.

It just seemed so much wasted time and money to fight over the small things but the disrespect just keeps piling from him and his attorney (who..you can't make this stuff up...is on the board of the local domestic violence programs)

That said, I am working on figuring out how to file for contempt and ask for perjury (longshot) and a new temporary order hearing called a de Novo

I was trying to not fight with the bio dad of my child but see no other way out now. Three years plus since I caught him cheating and still this ..

Shehawk posted 6/23/2021 11:00 AM

And thanks Anna it always feels good when SI folks weigh in

Catwoman posted 6/23/2021 11:54 AM

I think if he is not complying with the current order, you would need to file a complaint for contempt, not a modification.

A petition for modification is to change the terms of the orders currently in force.

A complaint for contempt is to petition the court for redress if the other party is found to not be complying with the current order.


Shehawk posted 6/24/2021 12:20 PM

Thanks Cat. It's a sort of all of the above in my "can't make this sort of stuff up" life

- not complying with the very minimal $ order first lawyer drafted in error not reflecting what the judge actually ordered (less than $150 the order tells him to pay and a few other minimal things in the actual written order)

-not complying with the written temporary order the court put in the electronic record (intent)

I am in the process of trying to figure out how to do a letter notice to the court which is how I bring this back to the Judge.

Then there is also him not complying with a series of other orders and his (victim advocate) attorney refuses to address this and even wrote an email stating he will not comply
This would have to be address by a contempt motion

Then there is him hiding employment/investment/deferred compensation in a business as well as lots of other stuff and flat out reporting stuff that is not true and his attorney doing the same.

Supposedly the Judge could award me every thing he is hiding to me
But I have no idea how to bring that back

And supposedly the Judge could rule on my case immediately. But this is a long shot.

In addition, the first hearing my attorney at the time did not include lots of bills and the commissioner gave my husband 2/3 of the marital income and both vehicles. So de Novo hearing bringing it to the Judge or asking for a modification

One thing at a time and one day at a time.

Thank you all for weighing in. You keep me going!

One day I will be free!

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