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Just going it alone, anyone?

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Justsomeguy posted 12/6/2020 10:57 AM

Oh, and thank you all for your responses. Chili, yours really resonated with me thanks.

Karmafan posted 12/19/2020 14:57 PM

Justsomeguy, I am so grateful for this thread. It really put things in perspective for me.

I ended a long term relationship in the summer, after having mentally checked out in January. Nothing was horribly wrong, but the spark was gone, and his penchant for routine clashed with my more adventurous nature. I actually need to thank this pandemic for giving me the courage to leave. For helping me realise that you donít have to stay in a relationship just because it is not abusive.

Anyway, long story short, I have been single since August and OMG, loving every minute of it. In fact, I donít remember feeling this peaceful and content in my whole adult life! Being kind to myself, doing what the hell I want, planning trips for next year and actually being able to focus, really focus, on my children, my friends, my job. Not proud of it but all had become an afterthought. Itís what an unsatisfactory relationship does: it swallows you whole and thereís so little of you left. You donít thrive, you implode.

Now I am embracing the solitude and the silence: the uncompromising quality of it. I donít feel lonely, I feel whole. I have purpose and am no longer stumbling through life trying to do everything and please everyone and losing myself in the process. Trading all this for the (few) highs and (many) lows of OLD? No effing way!

Itís so nice to have that echoed on here. May I say, I havenít been on this site for years and it feels like coming home

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