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Should I tell him?

lizgwvet posted 9/5/2019 21:35 PM

All, meet a nice guy on line, nicest guy so far.
He is a widower, lost his wife due to ALS ( Lou Gehrig)
Been dating just a short time but I feel I should disclose that I was diagnosed with MS in 2001. I am doing very well, but the possibility that I could have an attack weighs heavy on me.
The guy has been through a lot and I think I should let him know sooner than later.
Thanks my wonderful friends.

PS I work very hard to stay in shape!

WhoTheBleep posted 9/5/2019 21:38 PM

Totally your call. If you see this going somewhere, and it seems he feels the same, I would disclose. My personal opinion. I would have the same concerns as you.

Hutch posted 9/6/2019 00:19 AM

Definitely your call. Iím leaning more towards telling him because of the way he lost his wife.

I figure this; he could be a wonderful support and be happy to continue seeing where this goes. He may decide friendship is the best for you both at this time. MS does not define you in that itís your only identity. Youíre beautifully and wonderfully made. Youíre a fighter! And youíre also just a woman like the rest of us who is navigating life after divorce and exploring new things.

Only you can decide but if itís a person youíre wanting to move forward with or even considering, might be good to tell early.

Good Luck!

lizgwvet posted 9/6/2019 00:53 AM

Yes, thinking early is the best route.

EvenKeel posted 9/6/2019 06:57 AM

I have a friend with MS. She was also diagnosed decades ago and it is VERY managed with her medications. She has no ongoing symptoms. So like you said, you are doing well and maybe always will be.

However, I would need to know early on in the dating if this is a dealbreaker for him. Two reasons - you don't want to get to involved (and heartbroken) down the road if he couldn't cope and secondly, it helps build that openness and trust early on.

I would bet he will be understanding and keep on dating you.

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