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Jenifer Dolus

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cocoplus5nuts posted 6/4/2019 09:08 AM

Who says infidelity doesn't kill?

This mother of 5 has been missing since may 24 or 25. Her estranged husband and his girlfriend were arrested for tampering with evidence and other minor infractions. Jenifer's blood was found in her garage and on body sponges and clothing found in various locations around Hartford, CT. Video surveillance appears to show her husband disposing of the items.

A mother does not just walk away from her children, especially if she is estranged from their father.

sewardak posted 6/4/2019 09:20 AM

how can people be so very cruel and murderous but also, so very dumb.
Has this EVER worked out for ANY guy trying to dump his wife for another woman?

cocoplus5nuts posted 6/4/2019 10:20 AM

Right? It happens over and over. The husband (or wife) usually gets caught. I really wonder what goes through their heads.

Want2BHappyAgain posted 6/4/2019 10:38 AM

Itís just sad all the way around...those poor kids .

WhoTheBleep posted 6/4/2019 10:42 AM

I've been following this, too. Even without evidence, when a woman goes "missing" (No pre-disposition for this, young children, going through a divorce, etc), we ALL KNOW who is responsible!!!! He f****** killed her. Her family knows it. The reporters know it. The police know it. The entire country knows it.

What a f****** arrogant moron. The fact that men keep doing this, knowing the track record of other men who have been caught, is flabbergasting and terrifying. They actually think they are special snowflakes, not like the others, and will get away with it.

It's s*** like this that makes me feel completely unsafe going through my own divorce. My husband was the perfect family man. He lived a double life which I uncovered and exposed. He now stands to lose half of the marital assets which he is arrogant enough to believe are all his. Nope, I don't feel safe at all. if anyone has a motive to get rid of me it's him.

This poor woman. I pray for her family and children. And I hope her husband rots in prison. And then hell.

Marie2792 posted 6/4/2019 11:03 AM

So sad. This same thing happened to a teacher here in NYC a month or so ago. Estranged husband and his pregnant girlfriend were arrested eventually. She had gone to his place to pick up their children after visitation and never saw her again.

Scott Peterson and Chris Watts we know those stories ..walk away and divorce if you met someone else you want to be with.

ibonnie posted 6/4/2019 11:06 AM

^^^Jeanine Cammarata^^^

OwningItNow posted 6/4/2019 11:55 AM

Who says infidelity doesn't kill?

He is not a cheater who killed; he is a psychopath (Jenifer's own words) who liked to bully, abuse, control, cheat, get revenge on those who wronged him, and get his own way every time who killed. His characteristics do not come close to describing all cheaters. And being with his OW was not his motivation. This is a scary dude who always did what he wanted and did not like to be told No.

I'm glad the f@ckers got caught. Those poor kids, between 8 and 13 years-old.

[This message edited by OwningItNow at 12:00 PM, June 4th (Tuesday)]

SisterMilkshake posted 6/4/2019 12:12 PM

FWH and I used to watch the ID Channel (the murder channel) all the time. We watched whilst he was having his LTA. Most of the shows are about spouses being killed and infidelity was involved. We both would say "How can people who once loved each other do that?" FWH would assure me. He would say "Don't worry, Milkshake, if I didn't want to be married to you any longer, I wouldn't kill you, I'ld get a divorce."

But, some of the shows were about AP's killing the BS. And he came to realize that his OW was Cray Cray and he had no control over It. So, even watching these shows he still had an LTA with someone he didn't even really know, not until he was balls deep did he realize who It really was. Thanks MisterSister for another way you risked my welfare.

eta: to fix words

[This message edited by SisterMilkshake at 1:03 PM, June 4th (Tuesday)]

Chaos posted 6/4/2019 12:28 PM


SMS - Same in the Land of Chaos!

Investigate ...

I'd always shake my damn head and ask Why? No good comes of this. Most of these are the same. Someone cheats and they both kill OBS so he/she won't find out. WTF?!

Mr. Chaos was always confused right along side me. All the while engaging in his own LTA. Probably texting AP while I'm sitting right there.

And yeah - she was bat sh*t crazy in her own right too.

cocoplus5nuts posted 6/4/2019 13:43 PM

His characteristics do not come close to describing all cheaters.

I understand this. However, I can't help wonder if she would still be alive if he hadn't cheated and she hadn't filed for D. Of course, idk if that's the only reason she filed for D, but she did cite it in her filing. I think cheating can add an extra layer of desperation or something to these people that might tip them over the edge.

It is so sad for her children. They will now be left with no parents.

OwningItNow posted 6/4/2019 15:39 PM

There are different types of cheaters with varying degrees of issues, remorse, etc. They have a lot of things in common for sure, but all of us can see when we are reading that many situations do not mirror our own. There is one difference that I personally think is critical to differentiate: did I marry a horrible person who was most likely going to cheat, or did I marry a pretty good person who unfortunately cheated at some point? (There is obviously gray area in that black/white thinking though.)

The BS must do soul searching on this point because if you married a horrible person then their cheating is one of many marital offenses and the likelihood that the WS can become "unhorrible" is slim to none. Jennifer Dulos had one of those husbands. If our pickers cannot detect a psychopath or--worse--feels comfortable around them (Me!) then we have a lot of work to do on ourselves. This cheater is the bad person who did one of many bad things in life.

For the BS who have a WS with predominantly good qualities, they stand a much better chance at R with this person. They will see more remorse and empathy. And there is little reason to believe their picker was broken when they chose this person. This is the good person who did a bad thing scenario.

I call 20/20 and Dateline the "someone killed their spouse" shows, and yep, there is frequently infidelity. I think that psychopaths are likely to cheat and kill; cheaters do not become psychopaths and kill. Psychopaths are short on empathy and tall on narcissism, so cheating and killing are nothing to them. Hence the need to fix your picker if you marry someone like this. There are signs, and we should have seen them--for our own safety.

[This message edited by OwningItNow at 3:45 PM, June 4th (Tuesday)]

Phoenix1 posted 6/4/2019 15:52 PM

He is not a cheater who killed; he is a psychopath (Jenifer's own words) who liked to bully, abuse, control, cheat, get revenge on those who wronged him, and get his own way every time who killed. His characteristics do not come close to describing all cheaters. And being with his OW was not his motivation. This is a scary dude who always did what he wanted and did not like to be told No.

And this ^^^ is why I have a very detailed letter in safe keeping for my kids in the event I disappear or die under unusual circumstances, and why I still keep information about my SO under wraps (from Xhole) after five years...

survrus posted 6/4/2019 18:49 PM


My cousins step daughter cheated horribly on her H.

When I looked him up he had died of Cancer I think he was in his early 40's or such. I can't help but think the trauma triggered his illness. He had even remarried.

Her Mother was crushed by her daughter too every time she looked at her grandkids.

steadychevy posted 6/4/2019 19:26 PM

You can easily argue that all cheaters aren't killers and all killers aren't cheaters. Nonetheless there is an awful lot of murder, suicide, murder suicide, double murder, double murder suicide associated with adultery. The stories are too common to be considered unusual.

As soon as I saw on the news about this poor woman I immediately suspected her husband and I immediately suspected adultery. I'm biased, of course. I can't help but image the terror this poor woman had. The pain for those 5 children and her parents is beyond my comprehension.

SisterMilkshake posted 6/4/2019 19:45 PM

I have a friend who lives in Florida on Merritt Island. She went to her local Walmart a few days ago. She couldn't get in. Police tape every where. All exits/entrances blocked.

An estranged husband shot the new boyfriend of his wife in the head and killed him. In a grocery aisle of Walmart. They were all employees of Walmart. I can't help but wonder if infidelity was involved. I would almost be willing to bet my own life on it.

No one deserves to be murdered over this shit.

ETA: Corrections: The shooter/ex-husband was an employee and the victim went there to confront him. The shooter has not been arrested at this time. I don't think the other two were employees of Walmart.

[This message edited by SisterMilkshake at 7:50 PM, June 4th (Tuesday)]

HoldingTogether posted 6/4/2019 19:46 PM

Who says infidelity doesn't kill?

Fucking exactly. I get so tired of people trivializing the inherent mortal danger that infidelity involves.

My wife got me involved, without my knowledge, in a love triangle with a police officer. A police officer with whom I was spending a considerable amount of one-on-one time. And who was, without exception, always armed during that one-on-one time. He and I would often leave our wives back at his house while we drove the (usually deserted) roads to the nearest market to pick up beer or food or whatever... and he would always, without fucking fail, have a 9mm on him in a fanny pack. (Yah, my wife cheated on me with a guy who wore a fucking fanny pack. Believe me I am mortified by that. Forget the infidelity what about the affront to basic good taste? )

How hard do you suppose it would have been for that fuck to shoot me just about any time we were alone and manage to come up with some story to get away with it? He was a cop after all. Iím guessing any story he came up with would get the benefit of the doubt.

When I broached that little factoid with the wife shortly after Dday she attempted to brush it off with a casual, ďOh, he would never do something like that.Ē

Of fucking really? Cause right up until, oh I donít know, exactly fucking Dday, I would have said he would never fuck my wife either. I would have said my wife would have never fucked my best friend either. I would have said that either one of them would never betray their entire families either.

We left the whole concept of ďHe/She/They would never do thatĒ in the rear view mirror fucking ages ago.

We are in anything is fucking possible city now... and it is fucking scary and dangerous as shit there.

First few months of R I used to come home from work half wondering if Iíd find his police motorcycle out in front of my house. Maybe we would all argue and heíd fucking shoot me. Maybe he could convince my wife to tell the cops that I was threatening her and she called him to come over and calm me down. Maybe I was acting crazy and unfortunately he just had to shoot me....

Sounds like a paranoid fantasy right? But bear in mind: I didnít know who these fucking people were anymore. Did I think they were psychopaths? No, not really. But then again just mere weeks before I didnít think they were cheaters and consummate liars either and I was sure as shit wrong about that. So who the fuck knows really.

And sorry to call you out but this shit here:

Hence the need to fix your picker if you marry someone like this. There are signs, and we should have seen them--for our own safety
.
Is straight up victim blaming. I have heard those exact same words spoken to BSí too many times to count. I shut it down when I see it used that way and Iíll shut it down in this instance to.

Are there sometimes signs? Sure, sometimes. But there are also times when people act so completely out character that every single person that knows them would be hard pressed to believe it even if they see it with their own eyes. There are crimes of passion in the heat of the moment. There are even just plain stupid fucking accidents that fucking happen when shit gets out of hand and crazy.

Saying there are always signs is just the story we all collectively tell ourselves so that we can actually unclench our assholes long enough to actually sleep with both our eyes shut.

The best way to avoid all of that shit is to have the best possible understanding that we can about the people we are surrounding ourselves with. Their motivations and conflicts and drives and desires.

And that is exactly the kind of fucking information that is stolen from a BS by the lies that their WS tells them.

There is simply no way to sugar coat that.

Sorry if I got all ranty and shit there guys. Kind of a sore subject with me. Pushes a whole bunch of buttons for me.

HT

OwningItNow posted 6/4/2019 19:50 PM

there is an awful lot of murder, suicide, murder suicide, double murder, double murder suicide associated with adultery.

For sure.

As far as abusive relationships go, a lot of people/women will try and hope for an improved relationship with a controlling partner, but when blatant cheating takes place, the kind that the psychopath refuses to stop or parades around, the abused party finally yells, "Enough!" And psychopaths don't take No for an answer.

SisterMilkshake posted 6/4/2019 19:52 PM

Yah, my wife cheated on me with a guy who wore a fucking fanny pack. Believe me I am mortified by that. Forget the infidelity what about the affront to basic good taste?
Fucking ay!

[This message edited by SisterMilkshake at 8:00 PM, June 4th (Tuesday)]

OwningItNow posted 6/4/2019 19:53 PM

straight up victim blaming.

All good ICs will help you fix your picker to weed out the narcissists and psychopaths. But to say that we had no clue? It's simply not true. Our FOO clouded our ability to see a narcissist clearly. Thank god for good ICs.

[This message edited by OwningItNow at 7:54 PM, June 4th (Tuesday)]

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