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who remembers this story?

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Stevesn posted 5/9/2019 18:49 PM

Dumbfounded74 had a similar story with a paternity scare attached to it. He hasnít been back in a year.

Last word was that he and WW were in counseling....

BraveSirRobin posted 5/9/2019 18:51 PM

William- that is the same story.
No, he's right. AmbivalentOne found explicit pictures on an old computer and learned that the AP and his entire family had died years earlier. Dumbfounded74 found a flash drive in a vase and learned that his WW believed her deceased AP (whose widowed W had since remarried) was the biological father of their daughter. I don't know whether dumbfounded74 ever posted his decision between D and R (he was leaning D). AmbivalentOne proceeded with D, and his WW ended her own life.

Butforthegrace posted 5/9/2019 19:15 PM

Ambivalentone posted here on General within the past 6 months or so. Sounded like he was slowly doing better.

I've often felt, in my "gut", that her AP intentionally took his own life and that of his family. How often does an entire family of 3 perish in a single-car accident? Almost never. As I recall, their car went off a road, slid down a snowy embankment, and plunged into a river. My gut is that AP's BOW was on the verge of finding out, or maybe even did find out.

There was also the factor that the college-aged daughters of Ambivalentone and his WW, after learning of the A, shunned and scorned their mother, one in an especially harsh way. The WW was staying with her sister. Over the holidays, the daughters pointedly avoided her.

So the WW lost her lover -- and the evidence suggests he truly was a lover. Then, after years of trying to move beyond that in secret and alone, she lost her BH, and her daughters.

There was a group of female friends of the WW who knew about her LTA and enabled it by, among other things, orchestrating "girls weekend" trips to NYC which were in reality romantic vacations that she took with her lover. I've always wondered if any of those individuals is aware of the tragic outcome. In a very real sense, their reckless wickedness was one of the vectors that led to the needless death of AO's WW.


[This message edited by Butforthegrace at 7:49 AM, May 11th (Saturday)]

sewardak posted 5/9/2019 19:46 PM

^^^ for those who donít think infidelity causes death. Say what you will about WS, but they donít deserve death, and yeah she took her own but she didnít think sheíd lose everything until she did

Wool94 posted 5/10/2019 05:28 AM

I think of his story often. How awful!

[This message edited by Wool94 at 5:29 AM, May 10th (Friday)]

pinkpggy posted 5/10/2019 06:18 AM

BraveSir- I forgot about that one! I read that too.

Butforthegrace posted 5/10/2019 07:56 AM

BraveSirRobin, if memory serves, Dumbfounded did a DNA test and learned that the child was his biological child, which seemed against all odds because at the time of conception, his WW was having frequent unprotected sex with the AP and was mostly denying sex to Dumbfounded.

Jorge posted 5/10/2019 15:03 PM

WW was having frequent unprotected sex with the AP and was mostly denying sex to Dumbfounded.

I recall Dumbfounded while trying to gauge the odds of being the biological father, asked his WW how often she had sex with her AP in comparison with him, she gave a ratio of 8:1 in favor of the AP.

The horrificness of that ratio has never left me. Because the number of sexual encounters so heavily favored the AP, Dumbfounded was stunned the results favored him. It may or may not have saved his marriage.

hadji posted 5/10/2019 21:56 PM

AmbivalentOne. That was such a painful story. But I remember another story on SI from many years ago when I was just lurking here but actively posting somewhere else.

The WW refuses to stop her A. The BH after many months of pick-me dance, decides to move out. She pursues a relation with AP, it disintegrates, she ends up hospitalized, then dates 2 other guys and finally kills herself after sending the BH a message, that she had always loved him.

The BH was totally effed up, and he posted here telling to R by all means (sadly it wasn't even his fault that the R never happened). Around 2014 or 2015 if I recall.

Striver posted 5/11/2019 00:32 AM

AmbivalentOne reminds me a lot of WaitedWayTooLong... similar types of guys. Both with complete balls to the wall sex affairs. I suppose it is easy to get into all of that BDSM stuff without the tension and issues of a marriage.

With those types of guys, the WW fares about the worst it seems. They are good men, respected, but can't forgive the affair, and the WW really winds up divorced and disgraced.

I suppose the death of the AP and family tidied things up for the WW a bit too neatly, easy for the IC to recommend holding on to it because it was all over anyway. WW loved BH after that, but she'd lost her other love anyway so who knows if BH was even first choice or what she had left. The story is sad and affecting, would make a good drama if it wasn't actually real.

swmnbc posted 5/11/2019 07:44 AM

I'd like to remind people that we're talking about real people here, one of whom still visits this forum.

Hope you're doing as well as can be, AO, and best wishes to your daughters as well.

cancuncrushed posted 5/11/2019 10:12 AM

I hope he has moved on and is living strong...full of joy and love...(((())))

northeasternarea posted 5/11/2019 15:28 PM

AmbivalentOne, I pray that you and your daughters go on to have a long and fulfilling life. And know that you arenít responsible for you WWís decision.

survrus posted 5/11/2019 20:25 PM

I think it's not uncommon for a cheater to hope for their spouses death. And I don't mean murder just the desire that the impediment to their happiness is gone.

KingRat posted 5/11/2019 21:08 PM

I'd like to remind people that we're talking about real people here, one of whom still visits this forum.
Hope you're doing as well as can be, AO, and best wishes to your daughters as well.

Amen, sister! We must have the collective respect to treat individuals are as such.

[This message edited by KingRat at 9:21 PM, May 11th (Saturday)]

Striver posted 5/11/2019 21:20 PM

I think it's not uncommon for a cheater to hope for their spouses death. And I don't mean murder just the desire that the impediment to their happiness is gone.

I don't know how BS ever reconcile when WS writes nasty things about them. I had one minor thing, it was still awful to read. It's the betrayal in writing as much as anything.

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