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Divorce/Separation
User Topic: Dear Wasband,
nowiknow23
Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 8:30 PM, August 4th (Sunday)

I want to thank you for giving me yet another hilarious contribution for my potential future memoirs.

I was beside myself with laughter when, during the walk back to our respective cars today, you cornered me (while wearing the wedding (?) ring you've yet to mention) and started grilling me about who I spent time with while in CA. The capper on the utterly surreal conversation had to be when you switched to "patronizing and ironic fucktard" mode and said, "I just hope that you will extend me the same courtesy I have given you by telling me if you start a relationship."

(sidebar - direct quote, people. OH YES, HE DID!!! And with a straight face, even.
I demurred that I would, of course, give him a heads up before INTRODUCING anyone TO THE KIDS, but that I was confident he wasn't asking me to keep him apprised of my (currently non-existent - not that he knows that) dating life.
Ahem. End sidebar)

I appreciate you not ruining my perfect exit by speaking again. It allowed me to hold my laughter until I was safely in the car and out of the driveway.

It's been a while since you gave me such a good laugh, Wasband. Thanks for upping your game again. I needed that.

Sincerely,
NIK

[This message edited by nowiknow23 at 8:35 PM, August 4th (Sunday)]


You can call me NIK

"If you carry joy in your heart, you can heal any moment."
- Carlos Santana


Posts: 25726 | Registered: Aug 2011
Take2
Member
Member # 23890
Default  Posted: 8:36 PM, August 4th (Sunday)


"We must be willing to get rid of the life we've planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us." Joseph Campbell...So, If fear was not a factor - what would you do?

Posts: 4129 | Registered: May 2009 | From: New England
gma56
Member
Member # 19595
Default  Posted: 8:37 PM, August 4th (Sunday)

"I just hope that you will extend me the same courtesy I have given you by telling me if you start a relationship."
It makes you wonder how they get through life doesn't it ?
I would have said," When you notify me of your life changes that will affect MY kids, I'll be happy to let you know any changes in my life.
What a Bozo.
But we know that.

[This message edited by gma56 at 8:40 PM, August 4th (Sunday)]


BW-Divorced
It's my life now, my choices, my mistakes to make and my victories to celebrate. His choices made me free of liars and betrayers in my life. That is priceless.

Posts: 20383 | Registered: May 2008 | From: Closer to where I want to be..
caregiver9000
Member
Member # 28622
Default  Posted: 8:39 PM, August 4th (Sunday)

O. M. G. I am speechless. AND snorting giggling hysterical with imagining it.

NIK, I would not have been surprised if lightning had struck him down where he stood.

unbelievable.


Me: 44, independent, happy, despite co-parenting with a lower muppet
FT "Stretch" (and Skew!) ;)
DS 13 DS 10
S 5/2010
D 12/2012

Posts: 5859 | Registered: May 2010 | From: a better place
inconnu
Member
Member # 24518
Default  Posted: 8:41 PM, August 4th (Sunday)

wow, he's just... aw hell, it's just easier to keep laughing..


Say what you wanna say and let the words fall out...honestly
I wanna see you be brave

Pretty pretty please, don't you ever ever feel
Like you're less than, less than perfect


Posts: 12164 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: DeepInTheHeartOf, TX
homewrecked2011
Member
Member # 34678
Default  Posted: 8:43 PM, August 4th (Sunday)

Thank God you do not have to go home with this man tonight, nor ever again!!!


me BS 52
him - 46
married 15 years DIVORCED 10 31 12
children - ds15 ds12
d-day 12-19-11
I gave a 24hour ultimatum then went to attorney next day
Divorce filed

Posts: 2206 | Registered: Jan 2012
GabyBaby
Member
Member # 26928
Default  Posted: 8:46 PM, August 4th (Sunday)

*snort*


Me - 42
SorryInSac (WH#2) - 47. DDay 7/12/14
Married 4, together 7yrs total
Status - Stick a fork in me...

DD(21), DS(18, PDD-NOS)
6 Furkids - 4 dogs, 2 cats

WXH (serial cheater, 12+ OW) - Legally married 18yrs

I edit often for clarity.


Posts: 6525 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: California
phmh
Member
Member # 34146
Default  Posted: 8:46 PM, August 4th (Sunday)

I don't know how you held it in -- you have some restraint.

I'm sure you will extend the same (nonexistent) courtesy that he did. FTG.


Me: BW, divorced, now fabulous and happy!

Married: 11 years, no kids

Character is destiny


Posts: 3406 | Registered: Dec 2011
nowiknow23
Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 8:51 PM, August 4th (Sunday)

I've come to think of him as a bit of an SI treasure. I mean - COME ON!


You can call me NIK

"If you carry joy in your heart, you can heal any moment."
- Carlos Santana


Posts: 25726 | Registered: Aug 2011
caregiver9000
Member
Member # 28622
Default  Posted: 8:53 PM, August 4th (Sunday)

You know what you do with treasure right?

BURY it!!!


Me: 44, independent, happy, despite co-parenting with a lower muppet
FT "Stretch" (and Skew!) ;)
DS 13 DS 10
S 5/2010
D 12/2012

Posts: 5859 | Registered: May 2010 | From: a better place
Housefulloflove
Member
Member # 38458
Default  Posted: 9:04 PM, August 4th (Sunday)

I'm amazed he's able to walk and breath at the same time.

It's like their brains are permanently disconnected from the world. There is reality and then the weird bits of reality that their brain absorbs and warps to create whatever picture of themselves they want to create. Sad!

I'm glad you got a good laugh out of it!


Me-29 Starting over
ExWH-29 Probable NPD, PA, manchild
3 beautiful young children
DDay 1/20/13 Admits PA
No remorse so NO R. DIVORCED! 9/2013

Posts: 541 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: USA
ArkLaMiss
Member
Member # 14918
Default  Posted: 9:06 PM, August 4th (Sunday)

Get the shovels ready...oh, and lime, lots of lime...and a tarp.....


Just HOW stupid do you think I am, exactly?

Posts: 1203 | Registered: Jun 2007
inconnu
Member
Member # 24518
Default  Posted: 9:46 PM, August 4th (Sunday)

okay NIK, tell us the truth. Was he this stupid when you were married to him, or did you drop him on his head during the divorce?


Say what you wanna say and let the words fall out...honestly
I wanna see you be brave

Pretty pretty please, don't you ever ever feel
Like you're less than, less than perfect


Posts: 12164 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: DeepInTheHeartOf, TX
Take2
Member
Member # 23890
Default  Posted: 9:48 PM, August 4th (Sunday)

^^^ killing me here inconnu ^^^


"We must be willing to get rid of the life we've planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us." Joseph Campbell...So, If fear was not a factor - what would you do?

Posts: 4129 | Registered: May 2009 | From: New England
nowiknow23
Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 9:50 PM, August 4th (Sunday)

Was he this stupid when you were married to him, or did you drop him on his head during the divorce?

I refuse to answer until the statue of limitations on divorce drop-kicks has passed.


You can call me NIK

"If you carry joy in your heart, you can heal any moment."
- Carlos Santana


Posts: 25726 | Registered: Aug 2011
Jrazz
Guide
Member # 31349
Default  Posted: 9:57 PM, August 4th (Sunday)

Sooooo it's going to be SUPER awkward when I send him pictures of us and tell him to stay away from my new girlfriend, then?

[This message edited by Jrazz at 9:57 PM, August 4th (Sunday)]


Cherish those who seek the truth but beware of those who find it. - François-Marie Arouet

Posts: 17835 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: California
missmydogs
Member
Member # 36559
Default  Posted: 10:03 PM, August 4th (Sunday)

I am in awe of your skills Nik! Really? Just Really Wasband?


Me 36
DS 16
DD 4

Divorced!

I've made a huge mistake - GOB


Posts: 71 | Registered: Aug 2012 | From: missmydogs
nowiknow23
Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 10:20 PM, August 4th (Sunday)

Sooooo it's going to be SUPER awkward when I send him pictures of us and tell him to stay away from my new girlfriend, then?


You can call me NIK

"If you carry joy in your heart, you can heal any moment."
- Carlos Santana


Posts: 25726 | Registered: Aug 2011
Betrayeddaddio
Member
Member # 30198
Default  Posted: 10:21 PM, August 4th (Sunday)

"I just hope that you will extend me the same courtesy I have given you by telling me if you start a relationship."

First thought....."Yes wasband, I will extend you the EXACT same courtesy"

(stories like yours reaffirm my "not a people person" status)


BH-42 WW-40 DD-5 DD-9 DD-11
D-Day 09/27/2010 Wayward wife had a 10 month A with married DB co-worker Separated Oct. 2013

Posts: 708 | Registered: Nov 2010 | From: Canada
nowiknow23
Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 10:22 PM, August 4th (Sunday)

Daddio - I highly recommend heading to an SI g2g when you can. It will absolutely challenge any "all people suck" tendencies that may be lurking about.


You can call me NIK

"If you carry joy in your heart, you can heal any moment."
- Carlos Santana


Posts: 25726 | Registered: Aug 2011
better4me
Member
Member # 30341
Default  Posted: 10:30 PM, August 4th (Sunday)

Oh MY! Do you think he was jealous???


DDay 11/17/2010 BW:52
Divorced

Posts: 3208 | Registered: Dec 2010 | From: Iowa
SBB
Member
Member # 35229
Default  Posted: 10:33 PM, August 4th (Sunday)

Oh.No.He.Didn't.l!!

Stop!!!

My ribs!!!!

I'm guessing this is a kind of proposal of sorts? You'd have to marry him then cheat on him in order to extend the same courtesy, no?

I'm sorry but you will have to marry him - it's just good manners, NIK. You can't be messing with etiquette especially when he is being such a shining example.

Get the net. Seriously.


I may have reached a point where I'd piss on him if he was on fire.... eventually!!

Posts: 5609 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Australia
silverhopes
Member
Member # 32753
Default  Posted: 10:48 PM, August 4th (Sunday)

who I spent time with while in CA

Sooooo it's going to be SUPER awkward when I send him pictures of us and tell him to stay away from my new girlfriend, then?

Just don't show him the sunset-dappled pier photos - he'd be super jealous then!

Seriously, though, none of his business, and frankly, I think you should come out to CA more often, NIK!


Find peace. Or sleep on it.
Sometimes my monkeys, sometimes my circus.
Infidelities are like icebergs - they may take many different shapes and sizes, but they all damage your ship.

Posts: 3905 | Registered: Jul 2011 | From: California
newlysingle
Member
Member # 38735
Default  Posted: 11:04 PM, August 4th (Sunday)

What a piece of work. You really did show restraint by just walking away.

My STBX lectured me about not dating while we were still married right after he told me ILYBINILWY and asked for a divorce. I found out about OW about a month later.


BW - Me (37)
XWH - (37) The Gnat
OW - Some dumb whore he picked up in another state and moved here here. Known as Hello Kitty.
M for 8 years, together for 10
1 DD (5), 1 DS (1 year)
Dday 3/13
Divorced 9/20/13

Posts: 918 | Registered: Mar 2013
nowiknow23
Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 11:37 PM, August 4th (Sunday)

Do you think he was jealous???
I can't imagine so, b4me. I think he's been searching for so long for any potential moral high ground upon which he can stand in judgment of me, and he was hoping he'd found it.


You can call me NIK

"If you carry joy in your heart, you can heal any moment."
- Carlos Santana


Posts: 25726 | Registered: Aug 2011
m334455
Member
Member # 26893
Default  Posted: 11:56 PM, August 4th (Sunday)

How do you do it? Really? I would have had tears running down my face from laughing so hard... and then if he'd started to get mad I'd probably have to put my hand up and say "no, seriously, stop now or I'm going to pee."

Freaking wedding band on the hand?


BW 38, 5 kids
Dday Dec. 2009

Posts: 4034 | Registered: Dec 2009
persevere
Member
Member # 31468
Default  Posted: 12:25 AM, August 5th (Monday)

..and the insanity that is Wasband continues to build - he is truly becoming an SI legend - kind of like Big Foot - I mean who would believe it if they hadn't witnessed it?

Your strength continues to amaze me nik.


Me: BW-44
Him: XWH-44
Together 9 yrs
DDays: 1/10/2011
Status: Divorced 4/27/11

Above all, be the heroine, not the victim. - Nora Ephron

It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
- J. K. Rowling


Posts: 4607 | Registered: Mar 2011 | From: Texas
FaithFool
Member
Member # 20150
Default  Posted: 12:30 AM, August 5th (Monday)

What??? No!!!

Big
Foot

*gasp*

[This message edited by FaithFool at 12:31 AM, August 5th (Monday)]


DDay: June 15, 2008
Mistakenly married Mr. Superfreak
20 years of OWs, WTF?
Divorced Dec 26, 2011
"Life is a shipwreck, but we must not forget
to sing in the lifeboats". -- Voltaire

Posts: 17490 | Registered: Jul 2008 | From: Canada
IrishLass518
Member
Member # 34373
Default  Posted: 8:16 AM, August 5th (Monday)

who I spent time with while in CA

Is it just CA or does it apply to all 50 states? just the lower 48? including Cuba? Do you need to send photos of each and every person you pass on the street? Really what are the guidelines of reporting to the ex? You should probably get clarification

[This message edited by IrishLass518 at 8:17 AM, August 5th (Monday)]


Me: 46 BS Divorced
Him: 45 Married OW
DDay: 07/04/2008
Divorced: 06/15/2011
5 kids: IrishLass 27,IrishLad 25, IrishLass 23, IrishLad 21 and IrishLad 12
"You can't run from trouble..there ain't no place that far"

Posts: 1777 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: WA
IrishLass518
Member
Member # 34373
Default  Posted: 8:24 AM, August 5th (Monday)

*GASP* What if Wasband doesn't APPROVE of who you see?


Me: 46 BS Divorced
Him: 45 Married OW
DDay: 07/04/2008
Divorced: 06/15/2011
5 kids: IrishLass 27,IrishLad 25, IrishLass 23, IrishLad 21 and IrishLad 12
"You can't run from trouble..there ain't no place that far"

Posts: 1777 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: WA
Jpapageorge
Member
Member # 31800
Default  Posted: 4:56 PM, August 5th (Monday)

Just tell him you had the most amazing late night massage followed by a hearty breakfast, walked through hills and groves of redwoods while having conversations on the deeper meaning of life and sharing the joy of a king-sized Snickers bar, enjoyed candle lit dinner at a Bayside restaurant and finished off the day with a moonlit walk for two across the Golden Gate bridge. And that was only Monday.

eta:A better description of the Snikers experience.

[This message edited by Jpapageorge at 5:26 PM, August 5th (Monday)]


"Either get busy livin' or get busy dyin'." (and I prefer to live)
"Shame on me for kissing you with my eyes closed."
Spectemur agendo.
Me: FBBF

Posts: 1751 | Registered: Apr 2011 | From: California
nowiknow23
Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 5:04 PM, August 5th (Monday)


You can call me NIK

"If you carry joy in your heart, you can heal any moment."
- Carlos Santana


Posts: 25726 | Registered: Aug 2011
gonnabe2016
Member
Member # 34823
Default  Posted: 8:19 PM, August 5th (Monday)

Oh, for heaven's sake.....


"Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive." - Sir Walter Scott

In my effort to be *concise*, I often come off as blunt and harsh. Sorry, don't mean to be offensive.


Posts: 8075 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: Midwest
Jrazz
Guide
Member # 31349
Default  Posted: 12:21 AM, August 6th (Tuesday)

He doesn't have to know that our friend Sven was actually a sweet sixty-something Asian woman.


Cherish those who seek the truth but beware of those who find it. - François-Marie Arouet

Posts: 17835 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: California
curiouswiz
Member
Member # 34405
Default  Posted: 8:09 AM, August 6th (Tuesday)

OMG. I love you guys.


God bless us, everyone.

Posts: 633 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: Boston
nowiknow23
Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 5:59 PM, August 6th (Tuesday)

Jpapa & Jrazz - I hereby sign you two up as my official ghost writers. Checks are in the mail.


You can call me NIK

"If you carry joy in your heart, you can heal any moment."
- Carlos Santana


Posts: 25726 | Registered: Aug 2011
kernel
Member
Member # 27035
Default  Posted: 8:53 PM, August 6th (Tuesday)

sharing the joy of a king-sized Snickers bar

Better be careful, he might think this is a euphemism for something else...

What a nutjob!

[This message edited by kernel at 9:03 PM, August 6th (Tuesday)]


"On particularly rough days when I'm sure I can't possibly endure, I like to remind myself that my track record for getting through bad days so far is 100% and that's pretty good."

Posts: 5243 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: Midwest
nowiknow23
Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 9:14 PM, August 6th (Tuesday)

Better be careful, he might think this is a euphemism for something else...
I think that was the point.


You can call me NIK

"If you carry joy in your heart, you can heal any moment."
- Carlos Santana


Posts: 25726 | Registered: Aug 2011
sparkysable
Member
Member # 3703
Default  Posted: 9:59 PM, August 6th (Tuesday)

Is he seriously for real? AYFKM?


D-day OW#1 2/2004; R for 6 years; D-day OW#2 5/2010

Marriages that start this way, stepping over the bodies of loved ones as the giddy couple walks down the aisle, are not likely to last.


Posts: 3400 | Registered: Mar 2004 | From: NY
nowiknow23
Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 10:58 PM, August 6th (Tuesday)

He is, unfortunately, seriously for real. I couldn't make this stuff up if I wanted to.


You can call me NIK

"If you carry joy in your heart, you can heal any moment."
- Carlos Santana


Posts: 25726 | Registered: Aug 2011
peridot
Member
Member # 18334
Default  Posted: 12:24 AM, August 7th (Wednesday)

You should photoshop some pics and put them all over your house, car, Facebook. If he can see your Facebook you should post some crazy stories.


I think...therefore, I'm single.

It is what it is.


Posts: 4788 | Registered: Feb 2008
woundedby2
Member
Member # 18522
Default  Posted: 12:36 AM, August 7th (Wednesday)

Wow. He really is a nutcase...

If he only knew just how good our group experience really was.


Me: BS
2 kids: DD15 and DS18
Him: The Assclown NPD
OW: "friend" of 15 years
Divorced! Feb. 2010

Everybody, soon or late, sits down to a banquet of consequences.
~Robert Louis Stevenson


Posts: 7824 | Registered: Mar 2008 | From: SoCal
Bravenewgirl
Member
Member # 36267
Default  Posted: 6:21 AM, August 7th (Wednesday)

Wow NIK, what a legend in his own mind. I would have throat punched him.

When WH and I were separated, there was this great guy sniffing around me (I did not go there, knew it was too soon). WH caught wind of it and quizzed me endlessly. i.e.: So do you think you will go on a date with him? Are you attracted to him?, yadda yadda yadda.

I told WH that I was undecided, but that I didn't think I would date him because he was "too muscular" and "too rich and snobby". The look on his face was priceless.


Don't come around here no more
-Tom Petty

Posts: 661 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: Canada
nowiknow23
Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 7:46 PM, August 7th (Wednesday)

If he only knew just how good our group experience really was.
WB2!! This is how rumors get started.

I told WH that I was undecided, but that I didn't think I would date him because he was "too muscular" and "too rich and snobby".
Thanks for the spittake, BNG!


You can call me NIK

"If you carry joy in your heart, you can heal any moment."
- Carlos Santana


Posts: 25726 | Registered: Aug 2011
SBB
Member
Member # 35229
Default  Posted: 1:44 AM, August 8th (Thursday)

I told WH that I was undecided, but that I didn't think I would date him because he was "too muscular" and "too rich and snobby". The look on his face was priceless.


I may have reached a point where I'd piss on him if he was on fire.... eventually!!

Posts: 5609 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Australia
tesla
Member
Member # 34697
Default  Posted: 3:31 PM, August 8th (Thursday)

Oh boy...just get back from vacation and look what's waiting here on the board...a wasband sighting!!!

This guy is just too awesomely stupid for words.


"Thou art the son and heir of a mongrel bitch." --King Lear

Posts: 4683 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: Indiana
SBB
Member
Member # 35229
Default  Posted: 9:59 PM, August 8th (Thursday)

Welcome back Tesla! We missed you girl!


I may have reached a point where I'd piss on him if he was on fire.... eventually!!

Posts: 5609 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Australia
Kajem
Member
Member # 36134
Default  Posted: 10:25 PM, August 8th (Thursday)

This thread needs a spew alert

Wb2-good one

NIK- I think you need to get out more, we could use more laughs around here.

Hugs,


I trust you is a better compliment than I love you, because you may not trust the person you love, but you can always love the person you trust. - Unknown
Relationships are like sharing a book, it doesn't work if you're not on the same page.

Posts: 5264 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: Florida
Topic Posts: 48