i've been gone for a while. working hard through my past, my why's and myself. its one of the hardest things i've ever done, but its so worth the fight. my BS and i have worked together to form our new marriage that is based on open, honest, and direct communication. I feel that our marriage is stronger now then it ever was before my A. granted we are not perfect and the fact of the matter is that's ok. we talk more and connect now on a level that was never there before. ppl always talk about missing the old marriage, but i'm here to tell you if you want it bad enough and are willing to truly put in all the work you can then the new marriage will be better than it was before. the new marriage is based on the truth of who you are at the core and truly becoming a better person because of your BS. and dare i say it even the BS becoming a better person in the process. my biggest hold up has still been the forgiving myself for what i've done. still can't do it, but the advice i've been given and the way that i view it as i need to take what i've learned and give it back. maybe through that process my own redemption is possible?!
[This message edited by longroadahead22 at 7:06 PM, June 29th (Saturday)]
WS (Me): 26 y/o
BS (Her): 26 y/o (MandoBando)
Relationship: M for 4 years, a 20 month old son and a 8 month old son.
Working towards R...
Despite the fact that i am an ass hole, horrible father, and horrible husband; i LOVE and
Posts: 76 | Registered: Oct 2012 | From: Toledo, OH
BaxtersBFF Member Member # 26859
Posted: 11:01 PM, June 29th (Saturday)
Nice to see you. WH - 44
BW - gerrygirl
Posts: 6099 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: Boise
Jrazz Guide Member # 31349
Posted: 11:26 PM, June 29th (Saturday)
Great update. Thanks for checking in! I bow to those who keep their hearts open when it is most difficult, those who refuse to keep their armor on any longer than they have to, those who recognize the courage at the heart of vulnerability. - Jeff Brown
Posts: 17311 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: California