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Newest Member: BrokenNoMore (45438)

Reconciliation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Bs fence sitting and it hurts!
wanttosurvive
♀ Member
Member # 31122
Default  Posted: 9:02 AM, August 23rd (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

So 3 years into r and major boundary issues, as I have heard it referred to here on SI ., emailing with another OW WTF!!!! What I want to know is what is wrong with me! I keep wanting to give WH the benefit of the doubt! I am obsessed with checking his phone! It is making me physically and emotionally ill. I am starting to really hate myself! I am in counseling and do intend to address this ! I swore this would be a deal breaker. This happened in May and I feel like I am just now coming out of some sort of shock! Plus I am suspicious he is still at it although I have no hard evidence,
I have been married for ever ... I don't have the first clue how to move off the spot I am on. I am planning on having another conversation today with WH, I tend to hold all this crap inside and then blow up, not good! I know I will get more clarity by having conversation with him, because it will be evident where he is with all this... I think there is a part of me that doesn't want to face things! thus the fence sitting and trust me I think it may be a barb wire fence 'cause it is hurting! So I say to myself when the pain is great enough I will be motivated to change. Ugh I feel to old for this shit!!!!! Thanks for listening your stories and input help!


"What doesn't kill you hopefully will make you stronger" changing from want to survive to 'intend to thrive'!!!

Posts: 98 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: north east
tl502
♀ Member
Member # 42607
Default  Posted: 9:31 AM, August 23rd (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You get off the fence when it is more painful to sit on it than it is to jump off of it.


Married 30 yrs.
dd1 9/10/2011 ea/pa
DD2 3/25/2013 same ow, never stopped email and phone contact.
Putting the past behind us and moving forward together

Posts: 313 | Registered: Feb 2014 | From: tl502
wanttosurvive
♀ Member
Member # 31122
Default  Posted: 10:33 AM, August 23rd (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My intellectual mind and my emotional self seem to be waging a war! Thus the fence sitting I know I need to jump it is just at this moment either side looks murky! But this fence sitting is not for me! Gotta take a leap!


"What doesn't kill you hopefully will make you stronger" changing from want to survive to 'intend to thrive'!!!

Posts: 98 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: north east
Topic Posts: 3

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